Been There & Being There
by A Christy
Summary: COMPLETE: Who's there when she needs a shoulder? SN
1. Two

**_A.N: _**OK, so I totally screwed up and deleted the first chapter of this story and I _a)_ don't have a copy of it anywhere; and _b)_ don't really want to re-write it right now. Fortunately, it was a short one and can be summarized as follows:

Sara finds herself at the business end of a fairly loony guy's gun outside a crime scene. She has her own gun drawn on him as well, but just as she thinks he's going to lose it and shoot her, Brass and Grissom show up and the dude gets scared and runs off. She thinks she's fine (read: _denial_) and although she's obviously shaken, she tries to blow it off and start processing the scene with Grissom and Greg (who arrived at the end, after the face-off between Sara and the gunman).

OK, hope that'll suffice for now. And now back to our heroine, Sara Sidle! lol

* * *

Sara gathered up her evidence bags and looked around her. The last hour had flown by as she robotically processed the scene. As long as she'd been searching for evidence, she'd managed to stay focused, but as soon as she had a moment to stop and think...

And her hands wouldn't stop shaking.

It didn't help matters when Greg had finally gotten the details of what had gone down, and had started to grill her.

"Are you sure you're OK"

She shook her head slightly in amusement. "Greg, seriously... I'm fine."

"But he had you... Shit, Sara. That was close. He could have-"

"He _didn't_. He didn't shoot, Greg. So don't even-"

"But how long were you standing there, face to face, _old west_ style?"

This whole line of questioning was making her more than a little uncomfortable, and she was trying to ignore the tingle of anxiety that was beginning to resurface.

Grissom stood off to the side, having arrived just in time to catch Greg's barrage of questions. He'd been about to interrupt when he saw Sara struggling to remember how long she'd been face to face with the gunman. He watched her as her brow furrowed in confusion.

"Um... I don't know..."

For a second she flashed back to those terrifying moments... or was it _minutes_? Time seemed to have warped during the frightening encounter. "Anyway, it's over. And it's no big deal, honestly. Can we move on already?"

Greg grinned in response. "Yeah, but man... You must have looked all _Jennifer Garner in Alias_, packin' heat... _Whoh_. I wish I'd gotten to see that."

Sara laughed in spite of herself. _Leave it to Greg_...

"Greg, just help me process, will you?"

Grissom finally decided to make his presence known. "Actually, Sara I'd like you to run with the evidence we have. I need Trace on those clothes asap."

"Uh, yeah... OK."

He looked at her with concern, still wondering at the slight confusion he'd seen on her face when Greg had been questioning her. "Sara, are you sure you're alright? What happened back there was... Well, that would unsettle most people."

She sighed and looked at the ground. "Really, I'm OK. Yeah... It was... Well it was crazy, but... Look, I'm fine, I swear"

He regarded her silently for a moment, then sighed himself. "Alright. But when you get a chance..."

She found that despite the fact that she was finally over him, she was still waiting for him to offer to sit down and talk with her about things, one on one.

But then he continued. "...I think maybe you should go see your P.E.A.P counsellor about all this."

She almost laughed out loud. It was obviously back to business as usual for him.

She knew that it wasn't that he didn't care- she could see that he did. But this was as much as he had to give. It was all he would ever have, and ironically it had been in counselling that she'd finally come to accept that. Intimacy and Grissom were two separate things altogether, and never the twain shall meet... or at least not for her.

And _finally_, she was OK with that.

She nodded slowly. "Yeah, sure... Probably a good idea."

He looked somewhat surprised at how easily she aquiesced, but then he nodded as well. "OK. Good. I'll see you back at the lab."

"You got it boss."

* * *

"Are you sure you're alright, Sar?"

Nick's concerned brown eyes watched her carefully, Warrick looking similarly surprised beside him.

"Yeah, Sara... Are you sure you're cool? I mean, damn... You got lucky back there."

She smiled at her co-workers, trying to allay their worries. "Yep. I'm cool. It was no big deal."

Nick looked at her skeptically, but before he could say anything she jumped in again.

"What are you guys doing here anyway? Your shift was over hours ago."

"Ah, something came up half an hour before the end, so here we are. We're just about to head back out, actually." Warrick looked at Nick for confirmation and the other man nodded.

"Yeah... yeah we are." He faced Sara again. "Listen, you sure you're -"

"_Nick_. Come on. I'm trained for this stuff. It's _so _not a big deal. Go finish your case."

He shrugged and gave her a look that said "_if you say so_" before following Warrick down the hallway. Sara took her evidence to Trace and then started to head back to her vehicle, hoping to be able to do some more processing at the site.

But before she even reached the doors that led to the main lobby, she felt as if someone had reached inside her chest and was squeezing slowly but firmly on her lungs. She took shallow breaths in an attempt to compensate, but her lungs still felt compressed.

Afraid to be seen in her current state, she clumsily made her way back towards the locker room. Thankfully she didn't encounter anyone in the hallway before she found herself pushing through the locker room door.

* * *

"Dude, my pager's dead. My spare battery's in my locker."

Warrick frowned at Nick. "Don't you have your cell?"

"Yeah, but I don't want to be without my pager too. Relax. I'll be, like, 5 minutes." Nick grinned at his colleague as he turned to head back towards the building. Warrick called out to his retreating back.

"Just hurry up, man. Catherine's waiting for us."

Nick raised his hand in understanding as he continued into the building.

* * *

Sara sat down heavily on the bench trying to catch her breath. She closed her eyes and began to concentrate on calmly clearing her airway, envisioning oxygen moving easily into her lungs. Slowly, she began to breathe easier and she leaned her head back slightly to blow out a small stream of air in relief.

And then she gasped as an image of the crazed man aiming his weapon at her flashed through her mind, the barrel of his gun now the size of a cannon in her fear-addled memory. She opened her eyes quickly, a frightened tear slipping down her suddenly pale face.

"Sara?"

She whipped her head around to see Nick standing at the door, a look of concern on his face.

"Oh, Nick... I..." She stood up quickly and turned, opening her locker and proceeding to rifle around as if in search of some important item. She tried to inconspicuously wipe the tear from her face as she faced her locker. "I thought you guys were heading somewhere?"

"_Sara_."

He spoke quietly from right behind her, and something in his tone made her stop her nervous fidgeting. He watched her shoulders slump as she looked down at the ground at her feet. He reached out a tentative hand and placed it on her shoulder.

At his contact, Sara felt the tears threatening again, but she tried to present a tougher image as she slowly turned to face him... And that image crumbled quickly as she saw the worry in his eyes, and he started to rub her shoulder gently. She tried to speak through a watery half-grin.

"I guess... I guess I'm not OK after all." Her voice broke on the last word and she sniffled as the tears began to fall more heavily.

Without a word, Nick pulled her into his embrace and cradled her head carefully with one hand, his other massaging her back softly. And when he whispered quietly, "It's OK, Sara... I'm here," she started to cry in earnest.


	2. Three

**_A.N:_** I just wanted to thank everyone who's taken the time to review this story so far. I _love_ reading your reviews, so thanks so much for all the amazing compliments. And just so you know, I'm open to constructive criticism as well... If it helps to improve my writing, it's all good!

Oh, and **_I Love George_**... I've been enjoying our game of "_pot vrs. kettle_" immensely! Your reviews are worth the price of admission, I swear- you seriously crack me up. But in my own defense for my late update (funny how you and I always have to add this bit, hmmm? lol ) I actually released _two_ chapters at the same time last time: _one_ for this story, and _one_ that was a rather lengthy epilogue/finale for one of my other stories, "Stumbling". (And yes that was a shameless plug! ;) ) So I think I deserve a bit of slack!

OK, and now back to our regularly scheduled programming...

_

* * *

_

Sara's sobs seemed to be tapering off, and Nick breathed an inward sigh of relief. Not because he felt uncomfortable being the one to console her, but because he wasn't used to seeing Sara this way.

She was usually strong and in control... and she usually kept her emotions under wraps at work. He'd seen her lose her temper a few times and it never ceased to surprise him how vehemently her anger took shape, but he supposed when you bottled up your feelings that tightly, when they broke free it was bound to be major. Like now. And the truth was, it was unsettling him to see her like this more than he'd care to admit.

There had been many a time when he'd actually _wanted_ to see her knocked down a peg or two... But not like this. She'd had a bad scare and it had obviously shaken her to the core.

And he understood completely.

He was unfortunately no stranger to being on the business side of a gun himself, and he knew all too well how it felt to realize just how much you really want to live when the choice was about to be made for you.

Her tears were finally slowing down and Sara realized she should probably move from Nick's embrace. But the warmth of him, the smell of him... his arms felt so strong around her and she was finding it hard to pull herself away. She couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so safe.

But she moved slightly in his arms as his cell phone started to ring. She pulled back and rubbed at her tear stained face with her sleeve, starting to look uncomfortable again. His face was apologetic as he looked at the phone display and flicked it open.

"Warrick?" He listened to the man on the other end before interupting. "Look man, I got tied up... No, look, just go on ahead without me. I'll catch up."

He saw Sara look at him awkwardly and she shook her head to indicate he didn't need to stay. As she began to turn he grabbed her forearm lightly and she stopped to look at him questioningly. He smiled gently and held up his index finger, indicating she should wait a moment.

"Look, Warrick... It's imporant, OK? If Catherine gets mad, she gets mad. It can't be helped." He smiled some more at Sara and she found herself wondering at his words.

_Important_?

She thought back to Grissom's response at the scene: _Go see your P.E.A.P. counsellor_.

She felt a small swell of gratitude for the man before her and she smiled slightly at him as he snapped his cell phone shut.

"You don't have to stick around Nick. I think I'm OK now."

His brows went up in skepticism. "Yeah, that's what you said earlier."

She smirked slightly. "Yeah, well..." She sighed as she sat down on the bench. Nick frowned down at her bowed head.

"You're not losing your mind, Sara. This is a normal reaction, trust me." He sat down beside her, clasping his hands in front of him.

She smiled slightly at his perceptiveness, and looked at him from the corner of her eye. "How'd you know what I was thinking?"

"Cuz I've been there." He turned to look at her directly now, and she looked back at him, nodding.

"Right... Of course you have. I'm sorry Nick, I forgot." She felt bad as remembered Nick's stalker. And now that she was here in his shoes, she felt even worse for not having been there for him the way he was for her right now. "But that must have been way worse than this..." She let out a long breath and leaned down, her head resting in her hands, elbows on her knees.

He smirked as he put a hand on her back, rubbing gently. "Sar, a crazy guy with a gun is _still_ a crazy guy with a gun. And the fear leftbehind afterwards is still the same."

"Yeah, but Crane was in your _house_... I mean, god..." She sat up straight again and looked at him. "And you were so strong through it all... I just... I can't believe I'm falling apart like this."

"Yeah, well you weren't there right after it happened Sara... I mean, ask Brass. I, uh... I pretty much fell apart." She wasn't convinced that he wasn't just saying this to make her feel better, but then his next statement surprised her. "Even worse than the first time."

She studied him closely and he was impressed to see concern in her eyes as she questioned him. "First time? This has happened to you more than once?"

He nodded, smirking. "Yep. Wouldn't have been too long after you started, I think. Grissom and I were working a skeleton found in the foundation of a house?"

"Yeah, I kind of remember that one. At least I remember being jealous that you scored that case."

Nick grinned. "Yeah, I remember."

"So, refresh my memory...?"

He ran through the story with her, and Sara's felt a ripple of shock when he told her about Amy Henler desperately aiming her gun at him, and how Nick had truly believed she would have shot him if Grissom hadn't shown up when he did.

"Wow, I don't think I ever heard about that part."

"Well, you were new and you weren't part of the inner circle back then..." He grabbed her hand. "... Like you are now."

The comment made her smile. "Wow. I always wanted to hang with the cool kids."

He grinned back at her and she realized that she was feeling a whole lot better all of a sudden. She also realized that she was enjoying the way his fingers were playing with hers a little more than she should...

She slowly removed her hand from his and started to stand up. "Uh, Nick... I... Thanks. Thanks for..." She held her hands out, uncertain what to say. "For this."

He stood now himself. "I didn't do much."

"Yeah, well... I think it was just enough, actually. Just what I needed, really..." She felt shy all of a sudden and she smirked at the ground. She raised her eyes slightly again when she felt his hand on her shoulder.

"That's what friends are for." He gave her shoulder a small squeeze and she felt that strange warmth again at his touch.

"Thanks." She smiled and he had started moving to the door when she stopped him. "Nick?"

He stopped and turned as she moved towards him. "Yeah?"

"Can you... Can you not tell anybody about this?"

He grinned. "About _what_?"

She smiled gratefully. "I mean, I know you're right and all... It was a normal reaction, but..."

"You've got an image to maintain?" He flashed her a cheeky grin and she laughed.

"Ah, a girl's gotta have some secrets." He laughed now too.

"I just hope you don't think you're tougher than me, Sidle."

She gave him a pretend punch in the arm as she moved past him through the door. "I know I am, cowboy. I know I am."

He smiled at her retreating back, glad to see she was more like her own self. But he found himself scratching his head as he contemplated how much he'd like to explore some of Sara Sidle's more intriguing _secrets_.


	3. Four

**_A.N: _**Oh man. I'm so sorry _I WANT George_. How could have screwed up your name after all this time? My bad! I must have been delerious or something. Or maybe I keep mixing up the _wanting_ with the _loving_ of George. I'll have to adjust my mental stalker setting back down to _low_...

And thanks again for the reviews. Damn, I love you guys... or is it _want_? I'm so confused...

* * *

"Yeah, I was upset but..."

Sara faded off and Dr. Grey gently prodded her. "But?"

"But I feel OK now." Sara's lips twitched with her usual vaguely repressed looking smile.

"Oh yes? But you didn't feel OK earlier?"

Sara nodded, grinning a little more. "Ah... Let's just say I had a bit of a meltdown not too long afterward. But I assume that's natural, right? I mean afterall, I had a gun in my face..." She cut herself off, starting to feel awkward again, even though she knew it was the truth.

She still didn't like the idea that things were slipping out of her control again, especially when she honestly believed that her previous PEAP sessions had been helpful. But still, it _had_ been a normal reaction... She wasn't losing control again. She _wasn't_. Anyone would have reacted that way. Even Nick.

_Nick_. The thought of him was strangely calming and she felt her discomfort fading away again.

Sensing her client's shift back into a more relaxed state again, Dr. Grey nodded. "Yes, Sara; it _is _a normal reaction. But I'm glad you came to see me anyway."

Sara nodded back, even though she might not have thought to come here if Grissom hadn't suggested it.

"And I'm also impressed you seemed to have managed your "meltdown" on your own. I think you really are coming to grips with things, and in particular your personal motivations behind your reactions. That's good news, Sara."

Sara's smile turned back into a smirk. "Uh... Actually..."

The doctor quirked an eyebrow in question, but merely waited patiently for Sara to carry on.

"I didn't exactly handle it all on my own." Sara looked a bit uncomfortable again and the doctor formed her own conclusions.

"Dr. Grissom?"

Dr. Grey was well aware of Sara's relationship with her supervisor, having been through it all during Sara's post- DUI sessions. But she'd gotten the impression that Sara had finally realized that ship had sailed... or that it had never really been a reality in the first place. Still, they were old friends so a little extra support wasn't out of the question.

Sara laughed lightly. "No, it wasn't Grissom. I mean, not that he wasn't concerned. And he was the one who recommended I come see you again."

"Ah. So then, do you feel comfortable telling me what happened?"

"Oh yeah... It's no big deal, really." For a moment, the question made her feel like something more intimate had been implied and she fought the urge to squirm in her seat. "I just kinda... Um, when I broke down in the locker room after it happened, a... a colleague of mine saw me. He... He was sort of a shoulder for me to lean on I guess...just when I needed it." She was unaware that her smile took on a secretive quality near the end. "So, I wouldn't go congratulating me on getting my head together just yet, doctor."

"Actually, I'm impressed you were able to let your colleague see you like that. Normally you would have played the "stiff upper lip" card, if I'm not mistaken. So I wouldn't downplay the significance of you accepting the help of a co-worker, Sara." She grinned now herself. "This is a good thing, trust me."

Sara laughed again. "Yeah, I guess you're right."

"Of course I am. See those diplomas on the wall? They're for real, you know."

They both laughed and Sara felt even more comfortable still, which Dr. Grey knew was key to getting her to open up. And she wasn't disappointed.

"You know the funny thing? Nick... The guy who... uh, was there... in the locker room... I guess it's just ironic, since I've gotten on his case a couple times about getting to close to the victims and their families."

The doctor nodded and Sara elaborated. "He's sort of the feeler of the group, I guess. I have to admit it's annoyed me by times, but... I've also always been a little jealous of how easily he can talk to people. And get them to talk to him."

"Like you, for example?"

"Yeah, I guess. He's just... he's a good guy."

"Sounds like."

Sara nodded, then realized she really didn't know where she was going with this. And despite the fact that she couldn't seem to keep him too far from her mind these last couple of days, she didn't really feel like discussing that with the doctor. She'd already decided that her feelings must be tied into how grateful she felt to him, that was all. And she hadn't dated anyone in a long time so... It was a natural response to an attractive man, simple as that. Nothing more.

But as she left the counsellor's office, she fought to hold in the blush on her cheeks as Nick's face crossed her mind once more, along with a single thought:

_Yeah, he's a very, VERY attractive man_...

* * *

Nick frowned as he caught sight of Warrick heading down the hall towards him, his arm around Sara's shoulder as he hugged her close to his side and looked down into her face. Sara was smiling like an embarrassed teenage girl, and Nick was surprised as he recognized the cause for the slight tightening in his chest: _Jealousy_.

He shook it off as they reached him, and forced a smile onto his lips.

_It's just the protective vibe_. _I was there when she fell apart, and now I'm feeling protective of her, that's all_.

He forced a carefree toneinto his voice. "_Ahem_. Am I interupting anything?"

"Yeah, right. Picture that." The tall, handsome CSI looked down at Sara. "You up for it, Sar? You and me... making beautiful music together?"

Sara smirked. "What makes you think I'd say no?"

"Uh, I _know_ you, Sara. _That's _what." He laughed as she nodded and agreed.

"Yeah, fair enough."

"Plus, I was under the impression you preferred your men a little older..."

Nick didn't know why this banter was making him uncomfortable, but he figured it may have something to do with the whole protectiveness thing. He suppressed the thought of Sara being with Grissom and chose to ignore any possible significance it might have. But he was a little surprised at Sara's next words.

"Ah, maybe once upon a time I did. But my tastes are changing these days."

As Warrick played along, Nick was once again somewhat annoyed.

"Well then... Are you ready to try something a little deeper and darker, Sidle?" His green eyes twinkled with the implications.

She laughed as she walked past her two colleagues, calling over her shoulder. "You couldn't handle me, Warrick."

Warrick nodded, laughing as he turned to Nick. "Woo... Maybe that brush with death is bringing out her wild side."

Nick just smirked. "Yeah maybe. Listen, you get the results from DNA yet?" He couldn't change topics fast enough, and hoped Warrick didn't notice his quick switch.

Warrick nodded, oblivious to his friend's discomfort. "Yeah, I was just coming to see you..."

* * *

Sara grinned, pleased at her little flirting session with Warrick. Maybe the doctor was right after all. Maybe she was coming out of her self-imposed shell.

Then she frowned, thinking back to _why _Warrick had put an arm around her shoulder to begin with: He'd come around the corner quickly and scared the bejesus out of her. She'd flashed back to that dreaded moment from two nights previous for a second, and it had obviously shown on her face since Warrick had immediately apologized and tried to make her feel better.

_I guess I'm still a little jumpy_. _It's to be expected_...

Then she thought about what she'd just admitted to those guys. She was definitely over Grissom, and her tastes _were_ changing... But who fit those those tastes now? Or maybe a better question was, who was _defining_ these newly found tastes?

Her mouth twitched back into her secretive smile as she recalled how much she'd enjoyed flirting with Warrick... in front of Nick. She couldn't deny that she had enjoyed looking as though she was desirable to someone else in front of him, even if it was all just in jest.

She immediately tried to clear her head. Crushing on her co-worker was foolish, and these little _make-a man-jealous_ fantasies were strictly high school level behaviour.

And who was she kidding anyway? This was _Nick_; they were as different as night and day. Even though they used to indulge in a little harmless flirting back in the day, she would never have imagined ever being interested in him before, and she was positive he'd never be interested in her. She needed to file this away as a foolish crush that had arisen from her feelings of gratitude to him, and move on.

The last thing she needed was to start pining away for another unattainable man.


	4. Five

_**A.N:**_ Sorry guys. Been in a mostly _internet free_ _zone_ this past week, so I've haven't been reading or reviewing much. On the other hand, I should have a bunch of great stuff to check out tonight! Hope you've all been writing lots. Whoo hoo!

And to try and update quickly, I just banged this chapter off in about 2 hours! I hope it doesn't suck too badly because of it!

* * *

She hadn't been working for very long the next night before Grissom approached her in the hallway.

"Sara... They've brought in the gunman from the other night." He paused for a moment, trying to gauge her reaction. Her eyes widened slightly, but she said nothing so he continued. "Are you up to ID-ing him? Brass and I can do it but-"

"I got the best look at his face in the dark."

He nodded slightly, again waiting for her response. He didn't think she looked upset at all, but still...

She let out a stream of air as she spoke. "Yeah, no problem. When?"

"Right now."

She nodded and they started off down the hall side by side. Rounding the corner as they headed towards the PD holding rooms, Sara spotted Nick as he started down another hall to their left. She held her tongue, ignoring the urge to call out to him.

Grissom had other ideas. "Nick!"

The younger man stopped and peeked back around the corner. He saw the two of them and nodded before moving in their direction.

"Hey Gris... Sara." The smallest semblance of a smile passed his lips as he looked at her.

"I hear you were looking for me?"

Nick nodded. "Yeah, I was hoping to catch you before I clocked out. We've got a bug from a scene we'd like you to take a look at."

Grissom seemed to perk up. "Really..."

Sara smirked to herself. "Go ahead Griss. I can handle this on my own. I'm sure Nick wants to get going home, so if you go now-"

"Actually, I'm going home regardless. Warrick's handling our little _friend_ right now."

Grissom looked torn, then made a decision. "It'll have to wait, Nick."

Sara was touched by Grissom's gesture; ever since he'd come to her condo that day she'd been starting to think it may have been the beginning of a beautiful friendship... Smiling on the inside, she turned to her boss. "No- go ahead, Grissom. I can do this on my own. It's no big deal."

"Do what on your own?" Nick looked from Grissom to Sara.

"Sara's going to ID the guy from the other night."

Nick looked at Sara with concern and she rubbed at the back of her neck uncomfortably, looking to the side as he questioned them. "The guy with the gun? They caught him?"

Grissom nodded. "Apparently so. That is, if Sara thinks it's him. So... Sorry. The insect will have to-"

"I can go with her, Griss."

Sara looked back at Nick in surprise, but he was looking at Grissom.

"I thought you were going home?"

"I'm in no hurrry. Really, I'll go with her. It's no problem." He finally looked at Sara, unable to read anything other than mild surprise on her face.

Grissom looked like he was more than ready to accept the offer. He eyed Nick in speculation. "You're sure?"

"Yep. Go ahead. I've got it covered."

Grissom gave Nick a small grin before turning to Sara. "Catch up with me after you finish, alright?"

"You got it, boss.

She watched as he disappeared around the corner then turned to Nick.

"Listen, Nick... I'm honesly cool with this. You don't have to come along. I'm a big girl now, I promise."

Nick grinned and threw an arm casually around her shoulder (at least he hoped it _looked _casual) and started to move her down the hallway. "I know I don't have to come. I _want_ to come."

"Oh. Well, I... Thanks. Thanks, Nick. I really appreciate you doing this." She stole a look over at him as he continued to guide her along. "But not because I can't handle it on my own, though." She smirked and tried to look tough. "Because I _can_."

He chuckled and gave her shoulders an extra squeeze. "I know, Sara. I know."

* * *

Sara turned away from the two-way mirror clearly perplexed.

"He looked so... harmless."

Nick smirked. "Yeah, he did."

They started walking back towards Forensics.

"It's kind of hard to believe I was scared of... _that_."

Nick snorted. "Yeah, well... You saw Nigel Crane. Did he look especially intimidating to you?"

"No, I guess not. Just... crazy."

"Yep. But put a gun in his hand and have it pointing at you..." He shook his head fractionally. "That there's a whole other ballgame."

"Yeah... Yeah, I guess you're right." Sara grimaced. But unlike Nick, she hadn't had some wacko camped out in her attic for almost a month, watching her every move. She gave Nick a sympathetic look but he was looking down the hallway. She trained her own eyes forward and tried to ignore the urge to hug the attractive man at her side.

Nick stopped when they reached the locker room, and Sara hesitated before stopping. She suddenly felt as if she was on a date, had just reached her front door, and was trying to decide whether to let the guy kiss her or not. This unfortunately led to thoughts of kissing Nick, and as she felt her cheeks beginning to redden she slowly started to move past him.

Misunderstanding her awkwardness, Nick grabbed her hand before she could escape. "Hey there... Hold up." He leaned around her a bit to look into her eyes. "You OK?"

She smiled shyly. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just thought I'd let you get going home."

He squeezed her fingers in reassurance. "And I told you I wasn't in any hurry to get home."

"Right. Well... I, uh... I better get back to work... I guess."

Nick nodded. "Yeah, guess you better." Smiling, he released her hand reluctantly and she turned to go. He opened the door and was about to enter when she stopped him.

"Nick?" She was facing him again and she shifted from one foot to the other nervously.

"Yeah?"

"Thanks again."

He smiled widely. "Anytime, Sara. Anytime."

A warm fluttering started up in her chest and she nodded meekly before turning to go again.

Warrick was walking towards her and she threw out a casual greeting before passing him. He turned to look at her back and speculated on the interesting body language he'd just witnessed in his two colleagues from his vantage point up the hall.

_Hmmm_. _What do we have here_?

* * *

Nick opened his locker just as Warrick entered the room.

"Hey Rick. How'd it go with _Mr_. _Creepy_?"

Warrick smirked. "You talkin' about the bug or Grissom?"

Nick laughed. "Dealer's choice."

"Yeah, well it seems we had a scarab beetle on our hands."

"A scarab beetle? Like in _The Mummy_?"

"Haven't seen it, but I'm gonna hazard a guess and say _yeah_."

"So that makes me think it's tied back to the museum exhibit at the Luxor and our shifty visiting curator."

"Yeah, that's what I'm thinking. Won't know until we get the DNA results back tomorrow, though."

"Which means I'm heading home." Nick grabbed his car keys from his locker.

"Right behind you, partner." Warrick opened his own locker and started to get changed, but curiosity was getting the best of him. "So, Nick... What was up with you and Sara a minute ago?"

"What do you mean?" Nick closed his locker and turned to the other man.

Warrick grinned knowingly. "I dunno, buddy. I was seeing some interesting body language back there..."

Nick frowned. "Dude, what are you talking about?"

"C'mon now. It's my job to read evidence. And the evidence was saying something interesting."

"Warrick, you're speaking in riddles. What are you getting at here, man?"

"All I'm saying is, if I didn't know any better I'd think Sara and you had something going on." He smiled suggestively and after his initial shock, Nick laughed.

"Warrick, you need sleep. You're hallucinating."

"I'm not so sure about that. Sara definitely looked like the girl that just got asked out by the highschool quarterback."

Nick shook his head, still laughing. "Am I supposed to be the quarterback in this scenario?" He chuckled harder and Warrick was laughing along with him now. "While I'm flattered, bro... and impressed you're finally recognizing what a catch I am, you've seriously lost it, man. We actually just got back from going to ID the dude who held her at gunpoint the other night."

Warrick nodded. "_Mmm Hmm_. I know."

"So then what are you talking about?"

"I told you, man. It was all in the body language. Hers... Yours... It was talking loud and clear."

"This from the guy who was flirting up a storm with her yesterday!"

Warrick laughed again. "Whooooo... Jealous there, Stokes?"

Nick laughed in protest. "Dude, you've seriously lost the plot. I'm goin' home."

"Alright. I'll see ya tomorrow, loverboy."

Nick continued too laugh and shake his head as he walked out the door. But he was a little unnerved by the idea of Warrick seeing something in him that he'd been working hard to deny to himself: His growing attraction to Sara. Hopefully his friend was just joking around. The last thing he needed was for people to think he had feelings for Sara. Even if it might be true.

Something else Warrick had noticed stuck in his mind as he walked through the parking lot.

_Her body language_...

Had Sara looked the same way? In truth, he'd been trying so hard to appear nonchalant himself that he hadn't noticed how she'd been acting. Now that he thought about it, she had seemed a little more nervous, and maybe a bit timid with him. Almost shy.

He scratched his growing facial stubble, grimacing.

_Probably because she just had to face that gunman from the other night, dumbass_.

He smirked, amused at how the mind often sees what it wants to see instead of what's actually there. But even so, he couldn't seem to quash the small part of him that was still hoping for the miracle.

He threw his duffle bag in the back seat and climbed behind the wheel, but before he could put his key in the ignition his cell phone rang.

Surprise washed over him as he saw the caller's name on the display.


	5. Six

**_A.N: _**Ok, so yeah... it's been a while since I updated, but I've been suffering from some serious writers' block, lemme tell ya. On the updside, I've been reading a lot of good stuff from everybody else! Heh heh. Keep up the good work, guys!

* * *

Sara nodded to Catherine as she walked past her, just catching the tail end of her cell phone conversation.

"No, Nick. I'm not calling to tell you to come back to work. I'm actually calling to tell you that you have tonight off." She paused, presumably as he spoke on the other end. Then she kept going. "Yep, you have a long weekend for a change."

Sara quickened her pace, trying not to appear like she was eavesdropping.

_So Nick's off tonight too_.

She considered what this could mean...

"Sara." Her boss had come up behind her, startling her from her reverie. She turned around, and it was like a dose of reality. Grissom stood in front of her, the hard, cold truth of the unobtainable represented in the flesh.

She swallowed heavily and pushed any thoughts of being with Nick out of her mind.

* * *

Shift finished and Sara felt a moment of pride at her own restraint. _Lonely_, but proud.

For the first half of her shift, she'd felt the urge to call Nick and see if he'd want to go for breakfast with her. At a certain point, she'd realized he must be sleeping by then and so she didn't have to fight the urge any more.

Now, she sipped her coffee and munched on the bowl of pasta in front of her. The truth was, now all she really wanted to do was sleep. She'd been having "night" terrors off and on for the last few days and was starting to feel the effects of the irregular sleep patterns. Yawning, she closed her blinds and and made her way back to her bedroom.

Maybe when she woke up, she'd be another step further away from this silly infatuation.

* * *

Nick woke up and stretched his arms over his head. His stomach rumbled and he realized what had woken him up: Hunger.  
He rubbed his belly and smirked.

_You're the boss_.

He crawled out of bed and made a pit stop at the bathroom before heading into the kitchen and rifling through his cupboard for breakfast.

_Hmmmm_. _Sara's probably done shift_. _I wonder what she's doing right now_?

He leaned against the counter, frowning. He didn't want to start down that road again. After Catherine had called him to say he was off tonight, it had taken a fair amount of willpower not to instantly call Sara and ask her if she wanted to meet him for breakfast. More willpower than he wanted to admit, in fact.

_Jesus, Stokes_. _You got it bad_.

And he still couldn't figure out how these feelings had arisen in the first place.

* * *

Sara rolled over in her sleep, caught in the effects of another dream. But this time it was different...

_His hand slid across her naked stomach, his fingers seemingly infused with electricity as sparks of arousal slid through her body_. _She arched her back as his head dipped down and suddenly his lips were following the trail his fingers left_. _She felt a moan escape her lips and he raised his head to look at her_. _Her breath left her when she saw the look in his eyes; they were burning with desire and she felt her body heating up in response_. _She reached up a hand to touch his cheek, saying his name_.

_"Nick_...

And suddenly her eyes flew open and she was staring at her bedroom wall, her heart pounding erratically.

_Jesus_.

She ran a hand through her hair and was surprised to find beads of sweat on her forehead. In fact, she was feeling hot all over. She couldn't stop the embarrassed grin from crossing her face.

_Yeah, hot is right_.

She rolled over on to her stomach and forced her face into her pillow, screaming in frustration. Not only was she not closer to getting over this sudden crush on Nick, it was obviously getting worse. Even her subconscious was betraying her now.

Climbing out of bed, Sara made her way to her bathroom where she splashed some cold water on her face. She smirked at herself in the mirror

_Damn Sidle, you got it bad_.

* * *

A few hours later, Sara was desperately trying to figure out what to do with herself. She flicked from channel to channel and thumbed idly through a magazine, but nothing seemed to hold her attention for long. Except maybe her phone, which she found her eyes drawn back to over and over again.

_You can't call him_. _Don't be an idiot_.

But why couldn't she just give him a friendly call? They were friends, weren't they? And friends were known to call each other. But she'd never actually called him before, so what would he think if she suddenly called him now?

_Don't do it_. _He'll see right through you_.

See _what_, though? If this whole thing was so fantastical, then there was really no way he would ever suspect that she'd developed feelings for him. So what would be the harm in calling him?

She let out an exasperated sigh as she turned doubtfully back to the taunting device.

* * *

Nick was feeling bored and frustrated. He couldn't seem to shake this craving for Sara and it was only getting worse. She was probably working tonight and he'd just spent the better part of the last hour trying to think up a valid reason to swing by work tonight. Maybe he could pretend he needed to get something out of his locker.

_Except why the hell would I need something out of my locker after 11pm_?

He shook his head, laughing at his own idiocy. It was currently only 6pm and he was already beyond antsy. And if she was working tonight, she probably wasn't even up yet.

_Man, you're truly losing it_.

He hadn't felt this anxious about a woman since... Well, since he'd first become interested in girls, actually. And once he'd realized that he rarely had any problem getting them interested in _him_, it had become almost too easy. He'd even become a little cocky back in the day. And many a woman had fallen by the wayside.

He'd never been cruel or callous about it; they'd just never lasted. He'd never really been that serious about very many women. He just hadn't met anyone who held his interest for very long. And Nick had always figured that it had been his own fault. Maybe he was incapable of feeling that kind of connection with anyone.

The last time he'd felt anything even remotely like a connection was with Kristy, and look how that had turned out.

He sighed heavily. Even so, he'd realized later that it had only been about sexual chemistry in the end. She'd been really, really hot and the sex had been phenomenal but... They'd really had so little in common. He'd known it probably wouldn't have lasted any longer than any of his other "relationships".

But now there was this; this attraction for Sara. He hadn't seen that one coming.

And even now he couldn't stop the small smile from forming on his lips as he thought about her.

She was incredibly smart and sometimes a little too serious... but when she smiled, it was like someone had opened a sunroof on a summer's day. And she tried to act like she could do the job without getting too involved with the people in their cases, but he knew she felt the anguish as much as he did sometimes. The fact was, the longer he'd known her, the more attractive she'd become to him in every way. He realized he'd actually thought she was beautiful for some time now, even before he'd been her shoulder to lean on that week.

He stared at his TV, not seeing the program that was currently showing. For days he'd been thinking about how amazing she'd felt in his arms, how _right_...

_And when I held her, I wanted to keep her safe forever and never let her go_.

That was the part that had his mind boggled. He couldn't remember feeling that way about anyone before. _Ever_.

He stood up suddenly, the frustration taking an even tighter hold on him. He went to the fridge and eyed the beer inside. The phone ringing stopped his hand in mid-grabbing position and he moved over to answer his phone grumpily.

"Yeah?"

"Oh, I... Nick, it's me. Sara. I'm sorry, am I interrupting something?"

He had to concentrate on swallowing carefully before he could speak. "Uh, Sara? Oh... ah, no. No I was just... You're not interupting anything."

"Oh.Good. You sounded a little... _off_, I guess."

He laughed lightly, a bit nervous. "Nope. I'm cool." A total lie, but she didn't need to know that. "So, uh...What's up?"

She licked her lips before launching into her cleverly practiced speech. "Well, I heard through the grapevine you were off tonight too, so..." She suddenly felt her words dry up and she began to panic.

_Oh man_. _I'm starting to think this was a bad idea_. _He's gonna think this is a date proposition_.

On the other end of the line, Nick came to her rescue (once _again_, she thought with irony), albeit unknowingly. "You're off tonight too? I thought you were working?"

Her mind began to unfreeze slowly. "Yeah. I mean... No, I'm not working tonight." She cleared her throat nervously. "So, I was thinking... Um, maybe... since you're off... That is, if you don't have other plans or something..."

She frowned and pinched the bridge of her nose, hoping it would help her get past this rambling mode she seemed to have become mired in. "I just thought maybe I could treat you to dinner or a movie or something... or _both_...Uh... To thank you for... for everything you did for me this week." She paused and let him absorb the offer, hoping he didn't read anything more into into it.

_He probably has plans anyway_-

"OK, yeah." Nick was trying not to sound as stunned as he felt. "Yeah, that sounds gre-... er, good. Sounds good."

"Yeah?" Sara's heartbeat sped up on the spot.

"Yeah. But you don't have to treat me, Sara."

Sara chuckled lightly, remembering a discussion they'd had a couple years back. "I know how fond you are of going _dutch_, Nick, but I want to do this. Honestly."

He smiled into the phone, also remembering that conversation. He was impressed she remembered it, but then again the lovely Miss Sidle had a mind like a steel trap.

"Well, OK then. And thank you."

"Don't thank me yet... This could be the most boring night you've ever spent since you hit Vegas." She chuckled softly, but it sounded nervous even to her own ears. A warmth infused her cheeks when he responded.

"I seriously doubt that, Sara. You may be many things, but you're never boring."

She wasn't sure what that meant exactly, and she felt a moment of doubt.

_Oh man, what am I doing_._ Back out now, while you still have your dignity_.

As if reading her mind, Nick spoke again.

"I meant that in a _good _way, Sara."

She laughed again and smiled into the reciever. "Yeah well..." She chewed her bottom lip. "So, what'll it be? Dinner? Movie?"

"I just ate, so... How about a movie?"

"Sounds good. What do you want to see?"

"Well, everything starts arround 7, yeah? Why don't you come and pick me up and we'll decide when we get there?"

"OK, sounds like a plan. I'll be there in about... oh, say 20 minutes to half an hour?"

"Cool. See ya then."

Sara hung up the phone and clenched her hands together in anxiety. Was this really a good idea: spending the evening with Nick and trying to pretend she wasn't attracted to him? It was a recipe for disaster.

But she couldn't deny the excitement that was running full speed through her body at the idea of spending time with him outside of work. And even though she was undoubtably heading full throttle towards disappointment and possibly heartache, there was no way she could back out now.

And she knew she didn't want to.


	6. Seven

_**A.N**_: Uh, yeah. _Way_ less than 16 days since I last updated if anyone's wonderin'... _ahem_.

* * *

Despite her protests, Nick not only paid for his own movie but also a large box of popcorn and some drinks for the two of them.

As they settled into the cozy theatre seats, Sara was at first unnerved by the close proximity to her attractive coworker and the inadvertant and frequent mingling of their fingers in the popcorn box. But she slowly began to relax once the movie started and she found herself caught up in the action. And Nick occasionally tossing bits of popcorn on her actually made her giggle at one point.

After the movie ended, Nick grinned as they made their way towards the parking lot. "That was a pretty fun movie, huh?"

"Yeah it was, actually. And even though it was a bit unbelievable by times, Matthew McConaughey sort of made it worth the price of admission."

Nick grinned. "You dig him? That's understandable, I guess. He is from _Texas_, after all."

Sara laughed. "Oh, so that makes it OK to have a crush on him?"

"Yep."

He flashed her a big smile and she felt her pulse speed up. While she was tempted to tell him that she'd been dreaming of another Texan lately (literally), she just gave a small smile of her own and played it safe.

"Good to know."

They were approaching her car, and Sara was beginning to feel nervous again. She was desperate for the evening not to be over, but she didn't want to press her luck. She was still amazed that Nick had agreed to come out with her in the first place. His voice broke into her thoughts.

"Man, it seems like forever since I've gone to a movie." He looked over at Sara in bemusement. "I'm not sure when it happened, but I seem to have misplaced my social life. I mean, don't get me wrong; I love my job but..."

"You need a life?" Sara quirked an eyebrow at him. "Seems to me I recall _someone_ telling me I needed to get out more, once upon a time."

Nick nodded, grinning. "Yeah, well... looks like it's time I took my own advice." He stopped when they reached the car and looked at her. "So what do you say?"

She looked at him curiously. "About what?"

He looked at his watch. "It's still early. Wanna go grab a drink somewhere or something?"

He watched her carefully, hoping he wasn't coming on too strong. A nervous tingle twitched in his stomach as he waited for her response. She looked a bit surprised so he hastily added, "Don't worry... It's not a date or anything. Just a couple friends having a couple drinks."

Sara smiled, although she couldn't ignore the disappointment that flooded through her at his assertion. "Oh well, as long as it's _not_ a date then, OK. Let's grab a drink."

Secretly relieved that she said yes, he nodded and grabbed her car keys, opening the driver's side door for her. She chuckled lightly as they both climbed into their seats. "You know, Nick... Since this _isn't _a date, you don't have to act all gentlemanly."

He gave her his biggest, shit-eating grin. "I will have you know, Sara Sidle, that I am _always_ a gentleman, date or no date."

She shook her head and started up the car. "Whatever you say, Mr. Manners. So where are we heading?"

* * *

A few drinks at the pub later, Sara was feeling a lot more relaxed. Relaxed enough, in fact to actually respond to the current line of questioning being tossed at her from across the table.

"Um... I dunno. Smart, I guess. And he can't be shorter than me." She laughed and Nick grinned back.

"So, no special look necessary? Blondes? Brunettes? Blue eyes...?"

She sipped her beer and tried to look affronted. "_Please_. Give me some credit, Nick. I'm not that shallow. And anyway, what about you? I bet you're a _breast_ man."

He almost spit out his last sip of beer. "_What_? Yeah, whatever..."

He looked a bit uncomfotable under his grin, but the beer was making Sara a little braver than usual, so she pushed a little further. "Well then _what_, Nick? What floats your boat?"

He laughed out loud then. "'_Floats my boat_'? Man, Sara... You're going all old school on me now."

She blushed as she laughed, but then she was the one to feel uncomfortable as he regarded her closely while he answered.

"Well... That's a tough one, actually. Seems like these days I'm not really sure what I'm looking for. Although it's not like I've had a lot of time to think about it lately. I'm not even sure I remember what it's like to date anymore."

Sara snorted in disbelief. "Yeah _riiiiight_."

He looked at her in astonishment. "What's that supposed to mean?"

She suddenly regretted her outburst and quickly started to backpaddle. "Ah, you know... Um, everyone knows you're... well..."

He watched her expectantly, unwilling to cut short her suffering. "I'm _what_?"

She gulped. "Popular. You're, uh... popular. With the opposite sex."

He burst out laughing. "Oh, Sara..." He fought to control himself, but he coudn't seem to reign in his laughter. "You're such a scientist!" And he started laughing even harder. She tried not to laugh herself but a few giggles slipped out on her.

"What do you mean? And you make that sound like it's a bad thing!"

"Yeah, well you're making _me_ sound like an animal on the Discovery Channel or something. '_Popular with the opposite sex_'? "

She grinned wider. "Hey, if the shoe fits!"

They laughed together some more and Nick was amazed at how much he was enjoying himself. He'd accepted that he was attracted to her, but he hadn't expected to see a whole new side of her. They'd been out a billion times as colleagues, but this was different. _She_ was different somehow. Or maybe it was him- he was just seeing her differently now. Whatever it was, he was just glad she'd called him tonight.

And just as suddenly, he felt the need to clear the air, if only to finally set the record straight about his "lady-killer" status once and for all.

"I haven't been, you know."

"Haven't been _what_?"

"Dating much. Or at _all_, in fact."

She didn't know what to say to that. "Oh."

After Kristy had been murdered, she'd noticed that his days of sliding in to work at the last minute with a big, cheesey grin on his face seemed to be a thing of the past. That whole sad incident had obviously done a number on him. Sara's heart went out to him as he smirked bemusedly.

"Yeah, the rumours of my sex life have been greatly exaggerated, as the saying goes. Hope you're not too disappointed."

She was confused by that last comment. "Why would I be disappointed?"

He gave her a tired, knowing smile. "Ah, you know. Sometimes it's hard when you find out people aren't who you thought they were."

Sara smiled back, amazed at his perceptiveness.

_Yeah, that statement works on oh-so-many levels_...

It seemed even more likely now that he, and probably some of the others as well, had known about her thing for Grissom despite her efforts to keep it well hidden. But if Nick had known about her unrequited love issues with their boss, he'd never said anything to her about it, thankfully.

She stared at him with a whole new sense of appreciation, once again chagrined at having been unaware of her colleague's many hidden depths. The longer she watched him, the more she recognized the other possible innuendos behind his words, and how his eyes shone with a touch more world-weariness than she remembered.

_Poor Nick_. _He's had some hard cases of late_.

He'd had a lot of cases involving dead kids in the last couple of months, in particular. Those were the toughest on all of them, and they were obviously taking their toll on Nick. Usually the most upbeat of all her fellow CSI's, she had noticed his ready smile wasn't always as forthcoming these days, and she worried that he might finally be turning as cynical as the rest of them.

And in the midst of all his own hard cases, he'd managed to be there for her when she'd needed a friend. She felt immediately guilty that she hadn't been around to return the favour, and the words were leaving her mouth before she knew what she was saying.

"I miss you, Nick."

At his slowly spreading grin, she hurried to elaborate. "I mean, at work. I miss working with you."

He laughed softly. "I know what you meant, Sara. I know." He grabbed her hand across the table. "I miss working with you too." She was rewarded by the old glint of humour returing to his eyes. "Even if I always had to show you how it was done."

Sara laughed, amazed at how easy it was for him to make her feel good. "Yeah whatever, Stokes. You're just lucky I owe you one right now."

"Sara, you don't-"

"Nick... You can either take advantage of my appreciation, or you can let it pass you by. It's your call." She grinned at him and pulled back her hand from underneath his to grab her beer. She watched him with amusement over the rim of her bottle.

Nick shook his head fractionally, partially in an attempt to displace the images of "taking advantage" that Sara had inadvertantly introduced. (Ironically, Sara had similar thoughts herself but had decided against voicing them. She wasn't _that _drunk yet)

"OK. Well then... If you feel like you need to thank me just for being a friend, then I guess all I can say is 'You're welcome'." He finished his beer with a last gulp. "And I may let you buy me another beer."

She grinned and flagged down their server.

* * *

A while later, Nick was looking a little sleepy and Sara regretfully spoke up.

"I guess we should probably call it a night, huh?"

Nick stretched his hands over his head, yawning. "Yeah, maybe." He looked at their empty bottles on the table. "We should probably call a cab, huh?"

Sara frowned momentarily but caught herself and nodded.

_Yeah, no more DUI's for me_.

Nick had caught her brief frown, though. "Something wrong?"

"Oh... no. Nothing, really. I just..." She thought quickly. "I just hate leaving my car behind."

"That's a pretty safe parking garage, I think. It should be fine. Plus, I can pick you up tomorrow and bring you back to get it."

"You don't have to-"

"Sara, you can either take advantage of-"

"OK, OK." She was laughing. "Thank you."

They made their way outside and Nick draped an arm around Sara's shoulder. "Know what?"

Her inhibitions lowered by the beer consumption, Sara allowed herself to enjoy the warmth of his body close to hers, and her voice was a bit breathy as she replied. "What?"

"I had a great time tonight. If this had been a date, it would have been a perfect one."

Her throat tightened and she tried to think of how to respond as Nick held the back door of the cab open for her and gave her address to the cabbie. As she scootched over so he could get in beside her, she knew what she'd like to say.

_So, Nick_... _Want to come to my place for a night cap?_

But she was smart enough to know that the very reason it was probably such an ideal date for him was because there was no pressure involved. He'd just hung out with a friend, therefore probably alleviating all the stress of having to keep up appearances and offers to "give her a call sometime". There were truly no strings attached.

She was wishing with all her heart that it wasn't the truth, but her brain knew it was.

Nick spotted the somber look on her face and leaned forward a bit to get a better look into her face.

"_Hey_. What's up?"

She turned, unnerved by the nearness of his face. "Oh. Uh, nothing. I think I'm just tired."

He nodded skeptically but didn't push. He fell back to safer ground.

"So, aren't you going to tell me how much fun you had with me tonight?" He looped his arm around her shoulders once more and gave her a friendly squeeze and she started to laugh again.

Her tone was that of grudging acceptance. "Yesssss, Nick. I guess I did."

"You _guess_? C'mon now. You _know_ you did." He squeezed her harder.

"OK, OK! It was fantastic! Amazing! The best non-date I've ever had."

He laughed and nodded triumphantly. "I _knew_ it. Another satisfied customer."

They laughed together and Sara leaned back against his arm, possibly more comfortable than she'd ever been in her life. Nick chewed on the inside of his lip and resisted the urge to brush his lips against her hair. And then all too soon they were at Sara's place.

Nick climbed out of the car and held the door for her as she slowly got out.

She smiled her thanks at him and he leaned on the door as the cab idled. She looked down at her hands before speaking quietly. "Huh, it's funny. I wanted to take you out to thank you for everything, and I forgot to actually... _thank you for everything_." She grinned sheepishly.

He gave her an enigmatic grin. "Oh yeah? What did you have in mind, Ms. Sidle?"

Her eyes wide, she stammered in surprise. "I... I-"

He felt bad for being such a sleaseball and putting her on edge when she was clearly just trying to say thanks. "Hey, I'm just kidding, Sara. This isn't a date, remember?" He rubbed her arm comfortingly.

She didn't want to look like a naive wallflower, and she still had a touch of liquid courage running through her veins. "What are you saying Nick? Do all your dates have a _special_ ending?"

It was Nick's turn to look shocked. Then he chuckled, shaking his head. "Nah, not all of 'em end that way. I'm a gentleman, remember?"

She smiled back. "I'm glad to hear it."

Then on impulse, she leaned in and kissed him gently on the cheek and his heart fluttered at the whisper-light touch of her warm, soft lips. She could feel her cheeks heating up, and she hoped the darkness was hiding it. She didn't know what had come over her; she just hadn't been able to resist kissing him. She hoped he wasn't put off by it.

"Um, I really do want to thank you, Nick. I just... you really helped me get through a weird time and I... I'm just really glad you were there. And... and thanks for not telling anyone about my little, uh, breakdown.

He grabbed her hand and gave her fingers a squeeze. "Hey- your secret's safe with me."

"I know it is. I trust you, Nick."

He smiled, incredibly touched by her faith in him. "And besides..." He let her hand go. "...a _gentleman _never kisses and tells."

She blushed some more as she laughed, the double- entendre not lost on her.

Nick continued to smile gently and began to climb back into the cab. He knew he should go before he ended up sweeping her up in his arms and carrying her straight into her bedroom. He cleared his throat.

"I'll call you tomorrow about getting your car, OK? Maybe after lunch?"

She nodded, still mildly embarrassed at having kissed him, even it had only been on the cheek. "OK. I'll talk to you tomorrow. Sweet dreams."

"You too."

He threw her one last smile and closed the door. She watched as the tail lights of the taxi disappeared into the night, wondering if maybe she would be having sweet dreams tonight. _Again_.


	7. Eight

Sara had managed to sleep soundly through the night, most likely due to the beer. She wasn't sure, however if she was relieved or disappointed at not having another replay of her erotic dream about Nick. As it was, she sipped her coffee and couldn't stop her mind from wandering aimlessly over the events of last night, and the _un_-date.

Except she kept re-imagining it as a _real_ date.

_Jeeze, you're an idiot_.

But she couldn't stop smiling at the irony: Possibly the best date she'd ever had wasn't even a real date at all.

_Oh well_. _At least I have a healthy fantasy life_.

But as usual, her self-doubt began to weigh upon her good mood and she began to question whether it was really healthy at all.

* * *

_Damn, why did I tell her I wouldn't call until after lunch_?

Nick had woken up early and had spent the better part of the morning wired from the night before. It had been a simple evening really, but somehow it had dramatically effected him. And his feelings for Sara had only grown stronger.

He looked at his watch again and frowned. Time was crawling at a snail's pace.

_Ah, screw it_.

* * *

Sara was jerked from her downward spiral by the ringing telephone. She was still frowning as she grabbed the receiver and mumbled 'hello'.

"Sara?"

"Ecklie? What's going on?"

"We need you to come in and assist days. There was a massive explosion at a factory and we need all hands for this one. Get here as soon as you can and get your kit."

"Grissom-"

"... Is already at the site. Get in as quickly as possible, Sara. We need you."

She hung up the phone, sighing. So much for having normal days off.

_Shit_. _My car_.

As if on cue, her phone rang again. Distracted, she picked it up again. "Hello?"

"Sara? It's Nick." Her heartrate began to pick up its pace.

"Oh, hi."

"How're you doing today?"

Surprised by the normalcy of the question, she responded in a puzzled tone. "Um, I'm fine."

Nick frowned. "You sure? You don't sound _fine_?"

"No, I'm good. It's just that... Didn't they call you in?"

"Huh?"

Sara started to explain when Nick interrupted. "Hold on, Sar. My pager just went off..." He frowned at the display: 'Need you at work ASAP'.

_Damn_.

"Well, I guess I'm not calling you too early about picking up your car after all. What's the deal, do you know?"

She told him what she knew and he said he'd pick her up in 10 minutes. After she hung up, she was feeling even more unsettled. She'd been looking forward to seeing him again, but now it seemed it would be at work. Well, she hadn't been lying when she'd said she missed working with him. And maybe she'd be more in control of herself when she was on her own turf: working.

When Nick showed up a short while later in his fitted black t-shirt and jeans, she had to look at the floor of the SUV while she climbed in to stop herself from blushing. Nick smiled at her just the same.

"Good morning. You look all well-rested and ready to do battle with the forces of darkness."

She laughed, partially because she felt anything but relaxed in his presence. "Yep. Lead the way."

"So, I was thinking we could postpone getting your car until later? I think we better get started quickly by the sounds of it, and picking up your car would require a major detour." He pulled back out onto the street and started towards work. "And we can head out to the scene together."

Sara grinned despite herself. "Hmmm. Sounds like another _non-date_, Stokes."

He snorted. "Nah, my dates,_ non_ and otherwise would be way more fun than sifting through a crime scene."

"I happen to enjoy sifting through crime scenes."

He raised a knowingh eyebrow. "Oh, I know you do, Sara. But my dates are even more fun than _that_. I promise you."

She laughed at his boast, but had to admit the truth to him. "Well, last night _was_ pretty fun."

"Yeah, and that wasn't even the real deal. You should try one of my actual dates." He snatched looks at her in between watching the road and he could have sworn she was blushing.

Sara felt her mouth go dry.

If only he knew how much she wanted just that.

* * *

It turned out that only a scaled down crew of 10 people worked in the plastics factory on the weekends. Unfortunately, 2 of those 10 were currently missing, including the owner's daughter who had popped in to do some paperwork. And the fact that she was 6 months pregnant made everyone that much more sober as they attended to their tasks.

Once Nick had donned his familiar vest and baseball cap, Sara had fought back a few unwanted urges on the drive over. She'd always thought he'd looked... well, _hot _in his forensics gear; even in the days before she'd started having these feelings for him.

But she was relieved when they reached the scene and as expected, her mind had cleared of all else but the job. It was a slow and lengthy process, sifting through rubble looking for the possible causes of an explosion, and Sara was focused on even the smallest details.

She'd been working for a few hours when a familiar pair of boots appeared at her side as she crouched near the large black mark she'd unearthed under some debris.

"Watcha got?" Nick handled the camera around his neck as he looked at the mark.

"Not sure. It's definitely a burn mark but it looks too old, like it's been here a while." She stood up slowly, rubbing her gloved hands together to try to clean off some of the dirt.

Nick took a few shots and then stood staring at it, a thoughtful expression on his face. Sara stood beside him, trying to see what he might be seeing. He pointed at the center of the pattern.

"It may be old, but it was clearly the result of an explosion. Look at the burn dispersement."

Sara nodded. "Yeah... Another explosion..." He looked at her and he could see the wheels turning. And he knew what she was thinking. He finished her train of thought seamlessly.

"Maybe I should get Catherine to ask the other employees if there've been any problems here before; other explosions."

Sara smiled at him. She loved how they all worked so well off each other, how they could all finish each other's sentences. And as Nick smiled back at her before heading off to find Catherine, she realized yet again how much she'd really missed working with him.

* * *

Catherine was walking back from questioning some of the workers when she felt her world shift.

She let out a shout as what should have been a solid concrete floor gave way beneath her feet. The next thing she knew she was slipping down a precarious and slowly dipping section of floor, grasping at the wires sticking out the side to stop herself from falling into the quickly widening hole beneath her.

"Catherine!"

Nick and Warrick had appeared at the edge of the drop and were now staring worriedly down towards their fallen colleague.

Sara rushed over just as Nick dropped down on to his stomach and reached a hand down towards her. Catherine looked unharmed but scared, her feet sitting on a section of the concrete that had lodged about 6 feet down. Sara refrained from telling them to wait for the rescue workers, knowing there was no way they'd stand idly by.

Catherine managed to reach Nick's hand and with Warrick holding his legs, he pulled her slowly up and over the side, hugging her close once she was safe. "You OK, boss?" He examined her carefully and Catherine looked back at him half in a daze.

"Yeah... Yeah, I think so."

Warrick was glowering around him. He shouted at a fire marshall who approached the newly opened chasm."What the hell is going on here? You guys _cleared_ this section!"

The fireman looked confused. "This is supposed to be a solid floor... Nothing below it but ground, as per the blueprints. That room down there didn't show up."

Warrick's temper seemed to be lessening and the news seemed to snap Catherine out of her stupor. She shined her maglight into the darkness below. "Looks like some sort of storage area, but there doesn't seem to be anything down there at the moment."

Sara watched her with admiration, once again impressed with the other woman's strength. Catherine had a real knack for snapping back from tough situations. As she considered her own recent meltdown, she felt as if she was a pale comparison next to her firey co-worker.

Catherine started to organize someone to go down into the mystery room, and Sara was about to return to her own work when she saw Nick throw an arm around his supervisor and give her another hug, saying something quietly to her that made her smile. Her heart suddenly sank.

But it wasn't jealousy that sparked the sadness. It was recognition. Recognition that Nick was just an all-round good guy; a guy who would always lend a helping hand whenever he could. Or a shoulder to lean on.

And with this knowledge came the realization that she wasn't special. Nick had been nice to her because of who he was, not who _she_ was. He'd do the same for any of them.

It finally and painfully sunk in that revealing her feelings to him would do nothing but put a strain their friendship and nothing more. If she said anything, he'd just be uncomfortable and she'd be embarrassed. And she'd already done the awkward scenario around the lab to death while she'd been hung up on Grissom. That was never going to happen to her again.

She finished off her processing and noted that Warrick was heading back to his SUV. If she could avoid getting too close to Nick for a while, it would probably be for the best.

Warrick halted at her call and she caught up with him.

"Hey, I need to get this back to the lab. Can I score a ride."

"It'll cost ya."

She grinned and moved towards Warrick's Denali as he led the way.

"Hey guys. What's up?" Nick's voice appeared from behind her and Sara's back stiffened unconsciously. "You heading back to the lab?"

Sara turned slowly, trying to avoid staring directly at him. "Uh, yeah. I have stuff to process, so..."

"I can give you a ride, Sar.'

"Uh, that's OK. Warrick's got me covered."

Nick tried not to let his disappointment show, and he nodded. "Oh. OK, well I'll see you guys back there then."

Sara had already turned away halfway through his reply and was now putting her evidence into the back of the Denali. Nick didn't realize he'd frowned at what had felt like a snub, if a subtle one, until he looked over at Warrick. His green eyes were crinkled in amusement as he mouthed the words '_body language_', and grinned.

Nick shook his head, smirking at his friend as he rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably. He mouthed the word '_whatever_' before turning and heading toward his own vehicle.

Nick climbed behind the wheel and continued to frown. Sara's sudden cold shoulder had surprised him, especially after last night...

He struggled to remain rational; maybe her mood had darkened at the crime scene. It would be more than understandable- they still hadn't found the poor pregnant woman, and they were quickly losing hope that she or the other man would be found alive. All of them felt the futility of their actions at times like these. It was always too little too late.

But they could still try to find out why this had happened and give some closure to those that were left behind. And make sure that if someone was responsible for the tragedy, that person was brought to justice. That was what they did.

Unfortunately, all too often their investigations affected them more than they could help, and Sara seemed to feel them particularly keenly sometimes. Maybe that was the case this time.

_Yeah, that's gotta be it_.

But for some reason he couldn't seem to shake the feeling that he'd done something wrong.

* * *

****

****

**_A.N:_** OK, for those of you who haven't read any of my other stuff, you maybe be noticing something: My M.O is to totally drag out the "will they/won't they-ness" until you're all about ready to scream. This could be because I enjoy writing, or it could be because I'm a sadist... the world may never know! lol.

Anyway, it's either gonna annoy the hell out of you or keep you coming back for more (or both!). Feel free to bitch about it all you want in a review!

**

* * *

**

SPOILER FOR SEASON 5 FINALE: READ AT YOUR OWN PERIL!

I just watched Quentin Tarantino on Letterman and he said the 2 hour CSI fiinale will NOT be a cliffhanger; everything will be resolved by the end of the episode! Thank GOD! I've been stressing about waiting until September to find out Nick's fate for ages now! PHEW

:D


	8. Nine

**_A.N: _**Howdy all. Yep, another update already (put that in your pipe and smoke it, _IWG_!). Anyhow, I just wanted to thank everyone again for the continuous stream of kind reviews. It really means a lot to me!

_The Air Alchemist_: Love the new name. Very existential!

_ForensicsFan_: Thanks for not writing that cliffhanger you threatened me with. I don't think my heart could take it until after I've recovered from the season finale. :O

* * *

Sara dropped some of her evidence at Trace and then moved into a lab of her own to examine some items she'd pulled from the factory rubble. Her nose down a microscope, she jumped when a voice called out from the doorway.

"Sara, have you seen-" Catherine frowned as she saw her younger colleague jump. "Oh. Sorry."

Sara blew out a stream of breath and tried to calm her erratic heartbeat. "It's OK, Cath. Um... How are you, by the way?"

Catherine shrugged. "I'll live. It's all in a day's work, right?"

Sara smirked. "Yeah, tell me about it." But she was well past dwelling on her own brush with danger. "So... Who were you looking for?"

"Nick. Have you seen him?"

Sara put on her poker face. "Uh, _no_. No, I haven't."

She figured maybe she might need to work on her poker face when Catherine quirked an eyebrow at her.

"_Okayyyyyyyy_... Is something wrong, Sara?"

She frowned in discomfort. "No. Why?"

Catherine pursed her lips. "Ah... Nevermind."

Despite the fact that she knew Sara had been getting past her own frightening incident with a suspect last week, Catherine was never one to dwell on the past. It was all over and done with as far as she was concerned.

Although Sara clearly had something on her mind, Catherine didn't really think she was the appropriate person to talk to her about it. And it was not like Sara was one to open up about things anyway.

And plus, she was busy. "Gotta go. Let me know if you find anything interesting. And if you see Nick, tell him to come find me."

"Will do." Sara turned back to her evidence, but she felt like her rhythm had been thrown off. Thoughts of Nick resurfaced and refused to be pushed back down.

_Coffee_. _I need coffee_.

She resealed her items and headed to the staffroom.

* * *

Nick had developed and sorted the shots from the explosion site, and now he was trying to find Catherine and see what she'd paged him about.

As he turned a corner, he caught sight of Sara just entering the staffroom. He paused for a moment, feeling suddenly unsettled.

_This is stupid_. _You can't start acting all weird around her now_. _Get your shit together, man_.

Even so, he decided now was the time to test his earlier theory. He needed to know he hadn't been the reason for her odd behaviour. He took a small breath, straightened his shoulders and moved down the hallway.

She had her back to him as she poured herself some coffee and he cleared his throat to get her attention. She turned slowly and Nick could have sworn he saw a flash of something in her eyes before her face became a mask of normality.

_Strike one_...

He felt his hopes going down the tubes.

"Oh. Hi, Nick. Catherine's looking for you." She turned back to her coffee, concentrating on controlling her emotions.

She still seemed distant and Nick hid his disappointment. "Oh... Yeah, I know. I got her page." He moved to her side and grabbed his coffee mug. She almost jumped when his arm rubbed against hers, and she tried to appear nonchalant as she moved over to the table and away from the source of her discomfort. She felt her body heating up and she attempted to will it back to normal.

_Keep it together, Sidle_... _Pretend things are back to the way they used to be_.

Flicking casually through the newspaper, she commented without raising her eyes. "Um, I think it was important, Nick. You might want to track her down."

"Are you trying to get rid of me Sara?" He'd tried to sound like he was joking, but all his attention was focused on her now, curious as to how she would respond.

Her head came up quickly, momentarily shocked at how he'd hit the nail on the head. Although it wasn't that she _wanted_ him to leave; no, she actually _needed _him to go. Not only for her self-respect, but for her sanity.

But she quickly recovered her senses. "Uh, what? No, Nick. I'm just... trying to help."

_Strike two_...

He nodded a fraction. "Right. Thanks." He finished adding milk and sugar and moved towards the door. He forced a tight smile to his lips and faced her one last time. "Oh... and just let me know when you're ready to grab your car and-"

"Oh, ah... Warrick's taking me... so... yeah, you don't have to worry about it."

She hoped Warrick didn't mind her volunteering him. She'd have to track him down and confirm that it was OK. She looked back down at the newspaper, not seeing anything.

_Strike three, and you're outta there_...

Nick shook his head again and gave up. "OK, then."

He left the room confused. He couldn't figure out exactly when things had gone wrong between them, but clearly they had. He still might have bought that she was just in a weird mood because of the case, or for some other reason... But as he wandered down the hall, he couldn't shake the look he'd seen in her eyes when he'd 'joked' about her wanting to get rid of him. She'd looked guilty, like he'd inadvertantly guessed the truth.

_Jesus, what the hell has changed?_ _What did I do wrong?_

His own mood sinking substantially, it occured to him that maybe she had figured out how he really felt about her and now she was uncomfortable around him. His frown deepened.

_How could she know?_ I _don't even know how I feel about her myself_.

Maybe he'd been flirting with her too much, and gone overboard with the whole 'date versus non-date' thing... who knew? One thing seemed for certain though: he needed to back off now. She obviously felt uncomfortable around him, whether he knew why or not. Even though it was the last thing he wanted, he was going to have to give her her space. He didn't want to ruin their friendship as well.

He should have known these feelings would lead to no good.

He saw Catherine going into one of the labs down the hall and made his way towards her, all the while wondering how he'd managed to make it into his mid thirties (and after growing up with 5 sisters no less) and he still didn't seem to know a damned thing about women.

* * *

Nick, Warrick and Catherine sat around a table littered with photographs and a few evidence bags. Despite the fact that all the CSI crews had been pulled in on this case, the three of them had gotten used to their own routine and fell back on it now.

After a few too many grunted or mumbled replies from his side of the table, Catherine turned to Nick.

"Man, why is everyone acting so weird today? I mean, _I'm _the one who fell in the hole..."

Warrick's shook his head defensively. "Hey, don't lump me in with sunshine over there. My mood's just fine, thanks."

Catherine smirked at Warrick. "I didn't mean you, Rick. Seems Mr. Stokes had a plate of the crankies for breakfast today. And then there's... Nevermind. I should know better than to worry about the everchanging moods of Sara Sidle."

Warrick's brows went up and he looked at Nick speculatively. "Nick _and _Sara in weird moods, huh? That's interesting."

Nick's eyes shot to his friend, a mild hint of warning behind them. "Don't start, Warrick. I'm serious."

Catherine was intrigued. "What am I missing here, gentlemen?"

"Nothing. You're not missing anything." The warning in Nick's eyes was becoming more defined, and Warrick continued to grin at him.

"You sure about that, partner? You didn't by any chance say anything to her, did you?"

Catherine was becoming confused. "Who? Sara?"

Nick shook his head irritably. "No, man, I didn't do anything." Then he sighed heavily as the questionable nature of that last statement became apparent. "At least, I don't _think_ I did..." He felt confused again and his head was beginning to hurt.

Warrick started to chuckle. "_Woooo _now. I was right, wasn't I? About you and Sara?"

Catherine was floored now. "Wait a minute here..." She looked back at Nick in astonishment. "You and Sara? Sara _Sidle_?"

Nick was about as uncomfortable as he'd ever been and he put his hands in front of him in a warding-off gesture. "There's nothing going on. _Period_. Everything is status quo." His eyes bordered on angry as they moved between his two colleagues. "Now are we going to try to figure this explosion out or not? Because if we're not, I can always return to enjoying my _day off_-"

"OK, easy now big fella." Catherine placed her hands authoritatively down on the table. "Nobody's going anywhere.We've got a job to do here so let's get back at it, shall we?"

She looked at Warrick and he stared back, the picture of innocence. Catherine couldn't hold back a grin, and he looked over at Nick with amusement, tongue quite literally in cheek. Nick shook his head in disgruntled wonder and cleared his throat pointedly.

"Yeah, well... I took one photo I think may be of interest..."

* * *

Sara spent the rest of the shift on edge from a combination of trying to make herself be instantly over Nick and from the insane amounts of coffee she was drinking as a substitute.

Greg had spent his last half hour of shift treading carefully around her and had finally been sent home to sleep after working part of his way into a triple shift. Grissom was oblivious of his colleague's mood as usual, and Sara's thoughts became even darker with annoyance. The man never seemed to have a clue about the world of people going on all around him.

_Maybe one day he'll actually become human like the rest of us_...

And then she instantly felt bad. This wasn't Grissom's fault; it didn't have anything to do with him. No, the fault was definitely all hers. She never should have even _entertained_ the thought that she could ever be with Nick. And the way she was feeling now was... ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous.

Nothing had happened and nothing ever would, and yet here she was acting as though she was at the dismal, heartbreaking end of a relationship.

_What the hell is wrong with me? I'm losing it_.

Grissom's voice broke into her thoughts. "Well, that's _that_, then."

She stared back at him in enquiry. "Sorry?"

"It was a system malfunction and nothing more. Our job is done."

"But... The -"

"Sara, it's done. I know you thought there was more to that mark on the floor and the hidden storage room and... well, quite frankly there may well be. But as far as this explosion is concerned, it was a machinery malfunction and nothing more. If there's something else going on there, it's not related."

"Maybe not directly, but it's still suspic-"

"_Sara_." He put a hand on her shoulder. "It's done. Go home."

Sara nodded despondently, dissastified with the outcome. It seemed totally unfair that something so random could have killed an innocent man and that poor pregnant woman.

_Would you feel better if there was someone to blame?_

She swallowed heavily and leaned against the corridor wall.

_Maybe I would_. _This just doesn't seem like justice to me_._ There's nothing fair about this_.

But as she moved down the hall towards the locker room, she started to consider that maybe her frustrations really had very little to do with the case and everything to do with her own life. She stopped walking and pursed her lips. She was almost at her destination.

_I think I better wait a while_. _I don't think I want to risk running into Nick right now_.

She wandered back to the evidence room and pretended to be double checking the tags. But half an hour later, she began to regret her juvenile behaviour when she realized she'd forgotten to ask Warrick for a lift to her car. She quickly made her way to the locker room, but there was nobody else around and she assumed they'd probably already left.

Greg was gone, and she didn't feel much like asking Catherine or Grissom for a ride, even if either of them was still around. It looked like she was going to have to call a cab.

_Oh well_. _Whatever_. _That's just the sort of day I'm having anyway_.

She got her things from her locker and headed outside. She pulled her cellphone out and called a taxi. She was just about to head over to the front steps to sit down when she heard a voice immediately behind her.

"I thought you were getting a ride with Warrick?"

She stiffened a bit, but then she slowly turned around.

_Damn, he looks so good right now_.

Dark, but exceedingly warm brown eyes crinkled slightly as he gave her a tentative, questioning smile. She immediately wondered if she was strong enough to get past her feelings for him, and then kicked herself for feeling so weak. She mumbled the words. "I guess we got crossed wires or something. Anyway, cab's on its way."

"Sara, I can drive you-"

"No, that's OK. I'm already sorted."

"Look, there's no need for you to spend-"

"It's no big deal. Don't worry about it."

"I just don't understa-"

"_Dammit_, Nick... I know you like to play _knight in shining armour_, but I don't need your help right now, alright? I'm a big girl. I can look after myself."

Nick froze, a shocked look on his face. Then his mouth became a thin line as he responded.

"Fine. Suit yourself."

He turned quickly and started off towards the parking lot, leaving Sara behind to hate herself for the look of hurt she'd seen in his eyes before they'd turned as hard and cold as coal.

A tear threatened to escape from her quickly watering eyes and she swiped at it impatiently as she sat down heavily on the concrete stairs and waited for her taxi.


	9. Nine

NOTIFICATION OF AUTHOR STUPIDITY: OK. I screwed up. I accidentally deleted the first chapter of this story, so this is just an insert to try to make the chapters align again... at least from this point forward! Sorry for the confusion, and feel free to review this chapter! Hah hah... Keep your eyes peeled for Chapter 10 soon! 


	10. Ten

_**A.N:**_ Uh, yeah... S'been a while! If I were you, I probably wouldn't remember what this story was even _about_ so...

To recap: Sara was freaked out by a wacky gunman, and Nick was a friend when she needed one. Now Nick wants Sara, Sara wants Nick but neither knows about the other's feelings _of course_ (otherwise, what the hell would I have to write about?)

When last we left our friends, Sara had recently taken out her frustrations on the very man who was causing them, poor Nick Stokes.

* * *

A crappy week went by and Sara hadn't caught even a glimpse of Nick since her little temper tantrum. She couldn't decide whether it was good luck or bad that kept them apart.

She felt nothing but regret for having been so harsh to him; he undoubtedly thought she was losing it again, and probably had no idea why she would be taking it out on him. And she'd been dying to apologize to him, but she'd chickened out every time she'd thought about calling him.

Another set of days off came and went (this time uninterrupted) and Sara pulled into the criminalistics wing parking lot detemined to be in a more postive state of mind, no matter what.

_Yeah, well_... _That's what you said all last week_...

While she was fairly certain that she hadn't been that bad to work with, she knew she hadn't been partcularly sunny either. Greg had given her the occasional concerned look but had had the good sense not to say anything, and for that she was grateful. And surprised. Greg seemed to have matured in leaps and bounds since he'd become a CSI, and she couldn't help but feel a little proud of her 'protege'. He was shaping into a fine criminalist.

With thoughts of Greg's improving skills still on her mind, Sara was actually smiling for a change as she walked down the CSI corridors. As she turned a corner, she ran straight into Grissom and he grabbed her shoulders before she fell backwards.

"Oh...Sara. Sorry."

She laughed lightly. "No big deal."

She grinned up at him and he marvelled at how nice it felt to see her smiling so freely again. He found that the small space between her front teeth ocassionally gave her a child-like quality, and his mouth twitched into his own version of a smile.

Despite having had a few ups and downs this past year, he was impressed at how easily she'd seemed to get through this last incident with the gunman. He'd been concerned at first, but she'd gone to her PEAP counsellor as he'd suggested and she seemed to be fine. He couldn't help but feel a little proud of her.

Grissom realized his hands were still on Sara's arms and he released them. "I was just coming to find you." He handed her a sheet of paper. "Death behind the_ Rio_. Suspicious circs. You're going to have to go it alone... Greg's on another case and I have to follow up with my own from last night. O'Riley is on the scene."

She nodded. "You got it." Smiling again, she moved down the hall past Grissom.

Nick had watched the entire exchange from a lab across the hall with a frown. Sara had seemed a little too comfortable in Grissom's arms for his liking. And this in turn made _him _feel uncomfortable.

Even though she'd pissed him off royally last week, his annoyance had faded into a dull ache somewhere along the way. Now all he felt was a sort of unrelenting longing and it was starting to drive him a little nuts. It hadn't even mattered that he hadn't seen her since she'd flipped out on him; if anything, not seeing her made him want her even more.

_Absence makes the heart grow fonder_...

He left the lab quickly and headed in the opposite direction, all the while telling himself he didn't care about Sara and Grissom and whatever might be going on between them.

But deep down he knew he was just kidding himself.

* * *

Sara looked down at her shirt with dismay.

A huge rip ran across the section covering her abdomen just below her chest, thanks to a nail sticking out of the side of a beam she'd leaned against while taking a photo at the scene. It hadn't cut her skin fortunately, but O'Riley had commented that she looked like she had just been in a sword fight.

She grabbed her windbreaker out of the SUV, despite the fact that it was easily still 80 degrees outside. She didn't particulaly feel like giving anybody the glimpse of her bra that the slit was occasionally providing.

She put her evidence in the back and climbed behind the steering wheel, cranking the air conditioning to compensate for the heat.

* * *

Nick rubbed his jaw absentmindedly as he pulled into the parking lot.

Yawning and tired, he was ready to pass his evidence over for the various necessary tests and head home for some shut-eye while the results were being readied. He looked at his watch. He'd managed to cut his overtime down to just under 4 hours for a change. Maybe his luck was changing for the better.

He smirked at the thought.

_Well, it couldn't get any worse_.

Slamming his door shut he made his way inside, hoping he could dump off his evidence and be at home and in bed sleeping within the hour.

* * *

Sara dropped her jacket on the bench and dug around in her locker looking for a fresh shirt. She pulled on the blue shirt hanging at the back but it caught on something and as she yanked to free it, her elbow connected soundly with the inside corner of the locker.

Nick was just entering the room as she gasped out loud from the quick burst of pain that shot up her arm. She automatically wrapped her other arm across her chest to clutch at her throbbing elbow.

His eyes widened as he took in the slash torn across the front of her shirt and the look of agony on her face and then he rushed towards her.

"Sara... god, are you OK? Are you hurt? What happened?"

Nick had put his hands on her shoulders and started in with the questions before she'd known what was happening. She looked back at him in amazement.

"What? Am I... ? Um, yeah, I'm fine Nick...I..." Her words faded out as she found herself caught up in the warm concern in his eyes, and the way his hands were stroking their way up and down her arms.

"Are you sure? I mean, your shirt..." He looked down at her stomach, confusion in his eyes as they returned to hers. "And you looked like you were in pain when I came in..."

She couldn't stop herself from chuckling and he looked even more confused.

"I banged my elbow when I was trying to pull a new shirt out of my locker... I...uh, I tore it at a scene."

Nick smirked and laughed lightly himself. "Oh."

Then a change came over his face and Sara felt her regret renewed as he took his arms off her shoulders and stepped away. He turned his back on her and started to open his locker as he spoke. "Sorry, Sara. I didn't mean to outstep any boundaries there. I thought you were hurt."

Sara frowned at his back. Clearly he had taken what she'd practically yelled at him last week to heart.

_I know you like to play knight in shining armour Nick, but I don't need your help_...

She now realized those words couldn't have been more wrong. The longer she was without him, the more she knew she needed him, even if the most she could ever hope for was his friendship. And even that much was in doubt right now. If only she could turn back the clock and stop herself from being such a bitch to him...

But it was too late for that now. What she really needed to do was apologize, and there was no time like the present.

She moved a little closer to him and looked down at her hands uncomfortably.

"Nick, I... I owe you an apology."

He stopped what he was doing and slowly turned to face her. He felt a tinge of hope at the look of regret behind her eyes but he remained silent, waiting for her to continue. She smiled sheepishly.

"Last week, when I..." She stopped speaking for a moment and let out a big sigh. This was harder than she thought. "I'm _so_ sorry I snapped at you last week. I don't know what I was thinking. I... I was having a bad day, I guess." She smirked self-consciously. "Anyway... You didn't deserve it and I'm really, really sorry." She put a hand tentatively on his forearm and looked at him with genuine regret. "You're the last person in the world who should have to put up with my shit... I... Well, after how great you've been to me and everything." She shook her head slightly. "I'm just so sorry."

She looked down at her hand resting on his arm and felt suddenly unworthy. She pulled it back slowly and again clasped her hands together nervously.

Nick had let her say her piece, all the while amazed at how remorseful she actually seemed. It wasn't like they'd never argued in the past 5 years, but she'd never apologized quite like this before.

Although, if he was being honest with himself, he'd couldn't help but admit that he'd never been quite as hurt by her comments before either. But he could tell that her regret was genuine, and that she really felt bad about the whole thing, even if he wasn't sure she was being completely honest with him about the reasons for her treatment of him. He still couldn't pinpoint exactly when she'd started to pull away from him that day, but it had been long before her harsh words.

But he knew now wasn't the time to bring it up. He was just relieved she was talking to him again. He couldn't stop the slow smile from forming on his lips.

"Apology accepted."

Sara's relief was immeasureable, and Nick grinned a little wider at the smile that spread across her face as she questioned him.

"Yeah?"

He nodded, laughing lightly and grabbing one of her hands. "_Yeah_."

She smiled at him gratefully, warmth suffusing her body as his fingers closed around hers. She couldn't think of what to do next, so she spoke again. "Well, I'm really glad, Nick. I didn't like the idea of you being mad at me." She smiled timidly and later, in hindsight, she couldn't believe she actually uttered the next words that came out of her mouth. "My world felt a little lonelier somehow."

Nick's mouth suddenly went dry and he looked downward before she could see the pleasure her statement had brought him. He instantly regretted his decision when he found himself staring at the bottom swells of her breasts covered by a pale blue bra, peaking out from the rip in her shirt. He tried to swallow but his mouth felt like it was stuffed with cotton.

He took a small breath and raised his eyes again, releasing her hand from his as he did so. Still smiling (he hoped normally), he slowly turned back to his locker and pulled out his jacket. "Well, I better get going." He rubbed the back of his neck as he turned back towards her. "I'm beat."

She nodded, a little disappointed he was leaving already. But judging by how her body had reacted to just the simple act of his holding her hand, she figured it was probably for the best. Her hands began to miss the contact instantly and she started to fidget with her pager. Her nerves seemed like they were electrified all of a sudden.

So when her pager started to beep in her hands, she jerked her arm up in surprise and it clattered to the floor.

They both bent to pick it up at the same time and not surprisingly, banged heads. Sara slowly leaned back, the pain in her elbow having been replaced by the fresh one in her forehead.

"_Ow_." She rubbed her head gently, eyes squinched shut again.

Nick retrieved the pager and rubbed his own forehead, smirking. "Damn, Sidle... I always knew you were hard-headed."

She tried to smile but her throbbing forehead distracted her. "Look who's talking..." She grimaced in pain and he chuckled lightly as he moved closer and put his hands on her waist and looked into her face.

"Are you OK? I'm sorry, hon." He smiled sympathetically, but Sara was a little caught up in what he'd just said.

_Did he just call me _'hon'?

She stared dazedly back into his face, now just a few inches from hers. "Uh, yeah... Yeah, I'll be OK. Just give me a second."

Nick had unconsciously started to move his thumbs slowly to and fro across her abdomen, and as one of them contacted with her bare flesh, she drew in a sharp intake of breath. He looked at her with concern.

"What? What's wrong? Are you sure you're OK?"

She nodded mutely, her eyes a bit wider as she came out of her daze. Suddenly Nick became _very_ conscious of her bare skin beneath his fingers.

Just a moment ago, he'd thought that just _looking_ at her was going to undo him, but this...

_This is worse_. _Much worse_.

He looked back at her at a loss for words. "I... Uh..."

Sara suprised him by plucking the pager from his hands as it started to beep again. She looked down at the display, relieved to be looking somewhere other than at Nick. Her pounding heart seemed to be shaking her brain loose and she needed to get it back on track fast.

Before she did something stupid.

"Oh... It's Grissom. I have to go..." She turned and grabbed her jacket off the bench, thinking it was probably better if she got out of there quickly. She could change later... When Nick was gone and her pulse returned to normal.

She plastered a smile on her face and tried to infuse her tone with lightness as she moved towards the door. "I'll see ya later, Nick. Get some sleep."

Before he could even try to respond, she was gone. Nick stood staring at the place where she'd been standing even more confused than ever.

_What the hell just happened there_?


	11. Eleven

_Oh my god_, _what just happened there?_

Sara concentrated on breathing in and out slowly as she walked down the hall, hoping that would stop the eratic beating of her heart. Unconsciously, she placed her hand on her stomach. The skin was still tingling through her jacket where Nick had touched her. She clutched at the material, mind spinning.

_Just what the hell was that?_

She took a steadying breath and forced a bland expression on her face as she entered Grissom's office. Hopefully some of his investigative single-mindedness would rub off on her and help her get her mind off Nick...And _fast_.

* * *

_Thank god this shift is over_.

Sara looked at her watch and yawned. It was almost two in the afternoon and she was finally giving up chasing evidence, at least for now. She'd had a headache for more than half her shift, but thankfully it had finally dissipated around noon.

She looked down at her blue button down shirt and shook her head with amusement. She'd inadvertently brushed against a white board and gotten a bunch of marker prints across the front.

_Two shirts in less than 24 hours_. _That's gotta be a record_.

All she had left was a tank top, so she pulled it carefully out of her locker and headed back to a stall to change yet again. It was a little skimpy for work, but since she was off she thought it would be OK.

She was just coming back out again when Nick entered the locker room. He stopped and stared at her, surprised to see her again so soon. And looking so... _sexy_.

"Sara. We gotta stop meeting like this." His lips quirked into a cute smile and she cursed her wardrobe change as she felt a flustered blush rising through her. She was sure her arms and shoulders must be glowing pink in addition to the onset of some telling goosebumps.

"Uh, hi." She rubbed her own arms nervously and cleared her suddenly tightening throat. "What are you doing here so early? Your shift doesn't start for a couple more hours."

"I wanted to check on my evidence. Well, _our _evidence- Warrick should be here any minute now, too." He looked down at his watch, not really noticing the time as he contemplated the opportunity that had arisen before him.

Once he'd gotten home last night, he'd tossed and turned for quite a while contemplating those few moments with Sara in this very room. A mere touch of her warm, soft skin under his fingertips had sent a shock of awareness through him; an awareness that had only dissolved after exhaustion finally forced him into a troubled, restless sleep.

All the while he'd toyed with the idea of just coming out and asking her how she felt about him; if there was a chance she had feelings for him...

Then why had she acted so strange around him last week? Why had she pulled back from him that day? She had clearly been avoiding him... but why?

And so he'd tossed and turned as he considered it all, including how she'd suddenly turned so skittish on him last night. What had spooked her? Had she sensed how he felt about her and was weirded out by it?

_So many questions and no answers_.

And here was the woman in question standing in front of him right now. What was he waiting for?

"So, long shift huh? You just heading home now?" He needed to warm up to asking the questions he really wanted to ask.

"Yeah.Yeah, I'm gonna grab a quick bite and then straight to bed." Her blush was revived when she realized she was discussing bed with Nick. She stumbled to cover it. "I... I'm pretty wiped."

Nick nodded, so caught up in his own inner workings that he didn't notice her subtle discomfort. All his CSI skills of observation were on hiatus as his mind ran over ways to phrase things so that he didn't freak her out.

"Uh, yeah... Yeah, I bet." He nodded slightly and took the plunge. "Listen, I know you want to get going but... Do you have a second?"

"Um, sure. Yeah... What's up?" She leaned back against her locker and hooked her fingers into the belt loops on her pants, desperately hoping she didn't look as nervous as she suddenly felt. He looked normal, but a tinge of seriousness entered his eyes and made her wary.

_Uh oh_. _What's this about_?

"Well, I was just wondering about something... About what happened last week."

She focused on keeping her breathing even. "What about last week? I mean, I said I was sorry and I meant it, Nick. I was way out of line when I-"

"No... That's not what I meant, Sara." A small grin tugged at his lips and she started to realize that he seemed a bit nervous. She waited for him to continue.

"Last week, before you... Uh, before you snapped at me- and don't apologize again. It's cool, honestly." He smiled at her kindly and then went on. "Even before that, you... Well, something was... weird." He looked bemused and she frowned.

"Something was weird? What? What was weird?"

"Uh... _You_, actually. You were weird."

Her eyebrows rose even higher. "_I _was _weird_?" Her mouth was going dry again.

_Oh, this is not good_.

Nick could tell she was trying to be patient, but he was certain he'd caught the briefest flash of panic in her eyes, and it was far from comforting to him.

_Oh man_. _Get out before it's too late_. _Cut your losses and run_.

But he had to know. The whole situation was getting to him, and he had to deal with it before he lost his mind.

"I mean... I know you said you were having a bad day but..." He drew in a small breath before he went on, and she felt her facade of calmness rattling.

"But what?"

"But why was I the only one you seemed to be avoiding?"

Sara's breath left her altogether for a moment, although she wasn't conscious of it while she stared back in amazement at him. He was watching her so closely she felt like he was trying to read her mind. And she was scared of what he might find there.

"Nick, I don't..." She trailed off as she stared back at him. She could read on his face that there was no point in denying it. He had a vaguely skeptical look on his face, as though he'd known she would go the denial route. She needed to find a new tack, and fast. As she looked down at her thumbs hooked around her belt loops and considered her options, she felt Nick move closer to her. She slowly rose her eyes to his, and now he looked as uncertain as she felt.

But she was sure she was the more nervous one after he uttered his next words.

"Sara, is there something you want to tell me?"

The thinly veiled panic flashed in her eyes once more and he felt a little guilty. But he needed her to answer him, so he waited.

She wanted to move away from him, but she was backed up against the lockers so she stood her ground.

_C'mon Sidle, you're a mature professional_. _You face tougher situations than this all the time at work_.

But those situations hadn't involved dealing with the man who'd unknowingly stolen her heart. She wet her lips and gave him an even stare.

"Nick, I.. I don't really know what you're looking for here. What is it that you want me to say?"

He sighed and leaned slightly to the left. "Look, Sara... I know you-"

"Well, well... What have we here? Am I interrupting something?"

Nick's head swung around to see an amused Warrick standing just inside the doorway. Sara seized the moment and slipped out fom behind him. She flashed a bright smile at Warrick as she moved towards the door.

"Jeeze, Warrick. Your mind is constantly in the gutter these days. It's a wonder you can focus on work at all. I'm thinking you need to get yourself a date." She attempted a small laugh, but it sounded a little nervous even to her own ears. Warrick either didn't notice it, or he chose to ignore it as he laughed with her.

"Girl, you know I don't have any problems in that department. Besides, I'm thinking it's you and Nicky here who have something you want to tell me."

She stopped suddenly and turned at his repetition of Nick's words from a moment ago, and she saw Nick's eyes go slightly wider as well. But she needed to get out of there fast.

"Yeah, whatever Warrick. I think we both know I'm not his type anyway. And besides, with the amount of time you two spend together, everyone's starting to think that _you're _an item."

Nick tried to hide his disappointment at her words and managed a tight grin of his own. "Oh, Sara... now you _know_ that's not true. Warrick is definitely not my type."

Warrick clutched his chest in mock anguish. "That hurts me, Nick. That hurts me."

Sara shook her head and decided to make her move. "You two clearly have some issues to deal with so I'll see ya around."

Nick's chances were slipping through his fingers as Sara moved towards the exit once more. He looked at Warrick's knowing glance and weighed the options. Was stopping Sara again worth dealing with Warrick's inevitable harrassment?

_Hell yeah_.

Nick followed her quickly out into the hallway. "_Sara_. Hold up a sec."

She stopped in her tracks, the hairs on the back of her neck standing up. She slowly turned around to face him, her brows arched in question.

"Sara, listen... I think we still need to talk, so-"

"Nick, I really don't know-"

"Sara." He put his hands on her forearms and she felt an immediateshiver that had very little to do with the air condioning. He stared into her eyes with a sort of patient amusement. "Humor me, OK? Meet me for breakfast tomorrrow morning after your shift."

She looked uncertain and he didn't want to give her a chance to say no. "Sara, please."

All she had to do was look into the warmth behind his brown eyes and she was sunk. Her brain was screaming "_Don't do it_!" but her heart decided to do the talking. "OK. OK, I'll meet you for breakfast."

He smiled shyly and she was sure she'd have given him anything he wanted at that moment. He let go of her arms, still smiling. "Cool. I'll call you in the morning, alright?"

"Yeah, that...Uh, that sounds good." She started to back up and she gave him another small smile as she began to turn away. "I'll see you."

"Yeah, have a good sleep. Talk to you in the morning."

Sara made her way slowly out to her car in a daze, hoping she was tired enough to get past the thousands of thoughts that were coursing through her addled mind.

Nick headed back into the locker room and didn't even have to see Warrick's face before he felt the urge to defend himself.

"Don't start with me, man. I told you there's nothing going on between us, and I meant it."

Warrick flashed him a cheshire grin. "What? Did I say anything?"

Nick shook his head, smirking. "Yeah, well... Let's keep it that way." He made his way out the door, calling out over his shoulder. "I'll meet you in the DNA lab."

Warrick closed his locker and considered the empty space where his colleague had just been standing.

_Yeah, there's nothing going on between them_.

_Yet_...

* * *

_**A.N:**_ Yeah, I know, I know. I'm the _devil_. I think I've seriously become a professional at 'the story _drag-out_'. Yep, it's a skill! ;)


	12. Twelve

**_A.N:_** OK, I'm here not looking for your forgiveness, but for your _sympathy_. I no longer have internet access 24/7! ARG! And I gotta admit, IT'S KILLING ME! EIIIIYYYYYEEEEE!

I moved, I have a new computer that needs to be set up, and I need to actually purchase a modum. (It all used to be free, but since I moved and it's a whole new ballgame!) So, I have have only the bare minimum of internet access, and as I mentioned above, I am slowly _dying _from the lack therof!

But more importantly, thanks to all you crazy cats who keep coming back for more. I could question your sanity... You must all be masochists or something. :O

Here's the recap: Nick convinced Sara to meet him for breakfast in the morning after her shift since Nick had finally started to try and get to the bottom of things in the locker room, but they were interrupted (by Warrick, of course) after he'd fnally gotten the balls to ask her why she had been avoiding him the other day.

* * *

"So... Come clean with me, man. What's really going on with you and Sara?" 

Warrick was putting his ID badge in his locker as Nick pulled off a sweaty shirt and reached for a clean one. He didn't look at the usually amiable Texan, but he could feel the tension permeate the air nonetheless. Nick let out a sigh.

"Dude, I know you th-"

"_Nick_. Come on, man. We both know who's the better criminalist here. I'm not stupid."

Nick couldn't help but snicker as Warrick turned to face him. "Oh yeah? I would question both those assertions if the answers are "Warrick Brown" and "True"."

Warrick laughed now too. "Man, fancy words don't hide the truth. I know something's going on. Don't insult my intelligence by denying it."

Nick paused, weighing his options. Warrick was right: There was something going on with Sara and him. The problem was, he still wasn't sure exactly _what_.

But he'd never been the sort to try and hide his feelings, and he decided now was not the time to start. His lips contorted into a half-grimace.

"The truth is, I don't really know what's going on."

He watched Warrick speculatively, waiting for the other man to make fun of him, but he should have known better. Warrick was always there for him when he really needed him, and now was no different.

"What do ya mean, man?"

And so Nick decided to come clean with his closest friend at the LVPD.

He gave him a brief breakdown of what had been happening in the last couple of weeks, and what had been running through his mind the whole time. Or rather, _who_. Warrick nodded in understanding, but refrained from shouting 'I _knew_ it!' like he wanted to.

"So, you've developed feelings for Sara. Hmmmm."

Warrick looked at Nick, trying to hide his surprise. He'd known Nick for over 5 years and he'd seen the women he'd dated... And Sara really didn't fit the mould. It wasn't that Sara wasn't attractive; she was. It's just that Nick's tastes tended towards the more overtly high-maintenance looking women. In fact, with the exception of a date with Detective Secula a few years back, Nick usually went out with model types.

But then again, he'd noticed that Nick really hadn't dated much in the past few years, so maybe his tastes had changed along the way. Who knew, maybe the more cerebral beauties were starting to become more appealing to his friend.

All Warrick knew was that one of his colleagues was attracted to another one, and he had to admit it made him a bit uneasy. Except... wasn't he guilty of the same thing?

He hadn't told anyone this, but he'd become more and more attracted to Catherine in the last year and he didn't know what to make of it. And the fact that she was his supervisor now didn't make it any easier.

So who was he to judge Nick for being attracted to Sara?

He decided to stick to being a willing ear, and encouraged Nick to continue. "Well... What's your take on the whole thing? Do you think it's mutual?"

Nick was relieved that his friend was taking him seriously, but he was still uncertain about the whole scenario.

"I just don't know, man. I just don't know." He sat down heavily on the bench. He looked bemusedly at Warrick. "Do you think I'm nuts? I mean, honestly... This is Sara Sidle we're talking about..." His expression became vaguely hopeless and Warrick tried to analyse the situation.

"You afraid she'll shoot you down or something? Like you're the one who's not _her_ type?"

Nick looked even more dejected and Warrick tried to take a more upbeat approach. "Who knows, Nick? Who knows? But you'll never know unless you ask, right?"

Nick looked even more skeptical. "Yeah, but what if she isn't interested in me? If I say the wrong thing, then I'm screwed. I mean, we _work _together, man. It could get really awkward."

"I don't know about that. Sanders has been asking her out for years and she doesn't seem to have any problems working with him."

Nick gave him a look that made Warrick laugh.

"OK, so Greg may not be the best example. I'm guessing there aren't many women around here that he hasn't hit on." He shut his locker and put his wallet in his back pocket, then leaned against his locker, regarding Nick thoughtfully. "Man, I just don't know what to tell you. All I can say is, _is she worth the risk_?"

Nick's brows went up for a moment as he considered this. Then a slow smile spread across his face.

Warrick grinned back. "Yeah, I thought she might be."

He moved towards the door, but before he exited something occurred to him and he turned back to look at Nick. "Besides, man... I think you have bigger things to worry about than the fact that she might not be attracted to you."

Nick frowned in question. "Oh yeah? Like what?"

One side of Warrick's mouth twitched up. "What if she _is_?"

Then he slipped through the door, leaving Nick alone with his thoughts.

* * *

Sara didn't see Nick when she came in for her shift, and to be honest she was relieved. She was too nervous about this impending breakfast thing to be able to look at him without blushing and stammering like an idiot. 

She spent the majority of her free moments during her shift going over the possible conversations they'd have...

_Sara, I've noticed you've been acting strangely lately, and I have a sneaking suspicion that you're attracted to me_. _I just wanted to let you know that I'm really flattered, but I think we should just remain friends and colleagues, OK?_

She could almost feel her heart breaking just thinking about that potential outcome. But then she would find herself indulging in the fantasy version...

_Sara, I've been noticing that things have been changing between us lately and I'm hoping you feel the same way about me that I do about you_... _That is, I'm nuts about you Sara and if I can't take you out to myDenali and make crazy, exhausting love to you right now, I think I might have to kill myself_...

This one usually brought a small smile to her face, especially when she started to imagine the ensuing encounter in the back of the SUV.

"Sara, you OK?"

Her head jerked up to see Greg standing in front of her with some paperwork in his hands. She smiled guiltily.

"Uh, yeah. Yeah, why?"

"Because I called your name twice and you didn't seem to know I was here. You had this faraway look in your eyes." His brows knitted in concern. "Are you still thinking about that moment with the gunman?"

She smiled at his sweetness, embarrassed to think about what had really been the source of her distraction. "Uh, no actually, I wasn't. But thank you for your concern, Greg. It's very sweet of you."

Greg smiled slyly. "Ah, so you think I'm sweet? Maybe I should take you out and show you my other good traits."

"You never give up, do you?" She laughed, shaking her head. "While I'm _sure _you have a lot to offer the right woman, Greg... I'm not her. Sorry."

He sighed melodramatically. "Ah, you can't blame a guy for trying."

She gave him a look that said 'Sure, why not?' and then looked at the papers in his hand, glad for a distraction from her... _distractions_.

"So, whatcha got?"

* * *

Her shift came to a close and she played with the cell phone in her pocket. Nick hadn't called, but maybe he wasn't even awake yet? Or maybe he... 

_Am I sure I'm ready to face this_?

She leaned back against the break room counter, once again lost in her own thoughts. She was starting to feel stressed out again when Grissom poked his head through the door.

"Sara. Something just came up. Grab Greg and your kit and meet me at my Denali."

Before she could even reply he was gone again. Sighing heavily, she got her things together and headed out to meet him in the parking lot. He was just closing the backof the SUV when she reached him.

"Gris, Greg's gone home, remember? He'd already worked a double and his case was done so..."

Grissom nodded, frowning. "Right. Well, he's going to have to-"

He broke off as Nick's vehicle pulled up beside them. As if mirroring Sara's nerves, the sky let go with a loud rumble of thunder in the distance. She wet her lips nervously as Nick climbed out and approached them.

"Hey guys, what's happening? Late shift call?"

Grissom almost smiled at his younger colleague's convenient arrival. "Yes, actually. Feel like joining in? You look well rested."

"Uh, yeah... sure." He looked at Sara in surprise, but then nodded. "I can follow in my rig after I sign in. Where to?"

Grissom gave him the details and then he and Sara sped away.

Nick took a moment to smirk at his luck, trying to decide whether it was good or bad. They'd have to delay their 'discussion' but still, it would be nice to work with her again.

As a few fat drops of rain started to fall, he trotted inside to put his name on the roster. Hopefully he wouldn't run over into his normal shift or Catherine would be pissed.

* * *

Sara looked out the window at the rain before looking back to the scene in front of her. She was starting to feel like no amount of rain could wash away the blood spread out before her on the living room carpet of this incredibly high-end home. 

Everything seemed to indicate a murder-suicide: A woman had killed her millionaire husband with a sawed-off shotgun and then turned it on herself. As Grissom often reminded them, rich people had issues just like everyone else. Still, they'd be thorough and let the evidence tell them the story, not the other way round.

She looked out the window again as she saw a car pass between the house and the flashing lights of the police cars parked across the circular drive. Nick had returned from running evidence back to the lab. She moved away from the window before he caught her staring at him. Grissom stood up from where he crouched by the coffee table.

"Sara, I think we've got everything we need. Why don't you head back with Nick and call it a day. We won't have any results until you're back in tonight anyway."

She looked at Grissom calmly, but her insides were anything but. As if on cue, Nick came through the front door, dampened from the rain.

_Just when I thought he couldn't look any sexier_...

He ran his hands through his short, wet hair and threw a half-smile Sara's way. "Of course I left my hat at home."

She smiled back. "Well, at least you have your jacket." She looked out the window again. "It was so hot earlier, I didn't think I'd need it."

He followed her gaze to the steady downpour outside. "Maybe it'll have let up by the time you leave."

She grimaced. "So, you mean in the next five minutes?"

Nick looked at Grissom in question. "Why? We done here already?"

"_Already_? We've been processing for over four and half hours so _yes_, I believe we are done here. I'll take the rest of the samples back. And I'm going to stick around a bit longer, but you and Sara might as well head home. Thanks for your help, Nick."

"Uh, sure. No problem." He turned back to Sara. "Ready?"

She forced her heart back down her throat and nodded, croaking. "Yeah." She grabbed her case and moved beside him at the door.

"You want to use my jacket?"

She looked down at her outfit: jeans with a white India cotton blouse over a white tank top. She figured she could cut across the lawn and keep from getting too wet.

"Nah, I'll be fine." She chalked up her next actions to her heightened state of nerves. "Race ya!"

Hefting her bag, she jogged awkwardly across the lawn leaving Nick to watch her with shock and then amusement. He snatched up his own kit and was about to follow her when he stopped in his tracks in astonishment.

Sara had reached the midpoint of the lawn when the automatic sprinkler system suddenly kicked on full force, pelting her across the back and the front without mercy. She stopped in surprise and dismay and Nick started to laugh out loud when he saw her shout at the sky:

"Oh, _COME ON!_"

He had to set his case down as he doubled over in laughter. Sara finally realized standing in the line of fire wasn't the best idea and she started to sprint towards the Denali again, still getting wetter by the second. Nick picked up his kit and made his way haltingly towards the vehicle, still intermittently overcome by laughter.

When he reached her, she looked less than impressed, but he still couldn't stop himself from bursting into a fresh bout of laughter. She tried to be angry, but the whole thing was just so ridiculous... and Nick looked so amazing when he was laughing in the rain. His eyes were sparkling and his wet hair and face just added to the effect. It was all she could do to stop herself from throwing herself into his arms on the spot. She smiled self-deprecatingly back at him.

"OK, OK... It was funny. Now can you please open the door?"

Nick continued to laugh and dug in his pockets for his keys. "Uh, wait a minute..."

Sara looked vaguely harrassed. "Now what?"

"It's just that I'm not sure I want you soaking up the inside of my car..." He stopped as Sara came at him, hands reaching for his neck as her expression mirrored her disbelief. He stepped back a few paces, laughing again.

"_Kidding_! I'm just kidding! Here..." He moved past her and opened the door for her. She climbed in quickly and gave him an exasperated look as she shut the door behind her. He climbed in a moment later and turned the key in the ignition. A blast of air-conditioned air blew from the dashboard and Sara felt an instant chill.

Nick heard her small gasp and looked over to see her wrap her arms around herself. Unable to avoid missing how her now much perkier nipples were suddenly pushing against the thin cotton material plastered against them, he swallowed heavily and looked away. He switched the temperature to heat and mumbled apologetically. "Sorry."

"That's OK. God knows I wasn't planning on taking a shower before I got in here."

He chuckled again and pulled out of the driveway.

He drove down the deserted highway and found he couldn't seem to keep from looking at her out of the corner of his eye. She was drenched and dishevelled... and he thought she looked more beautiful than ever.

"So, I'm thinking I'll take you home to get changed?"

She nodded. "I'd appreciate it."

"Then... lunch? We're pushing it for breakfast, so..." He couldn't seem to stop the sudden case of nerves that started up in his belly as he waited for her to respond. Earlier this morning, he'd gone throught the same thing just before he'd planned on calling her. And even then, he'd been afraid she'd somehow manage to get out of meeting him, so he'd decided to just show up at work as her shift was finishing.

_And that turned out pretty good, actually_.

He took another sidelong glance at the drenched woman beside him. Her dripping hair was becoming wavy now, and her shirt seemed to cling to her in all the right places. He could see a bead of water make its way down her throat and then slip below her shirt to regions he'd only fantasized about... He pulled his eyes back to the road before he made them crash.

Sara was unaware of Nick's observation of her since she was lost in her own nervous thoughts.

_Oh god_. _He still wants to talk_. _I don't know if I can do this now_.

"Well... I... Uh..."

"Sara. Don't back out on me now. You promised." His tone was more insistent than complaining and she chewed on her bottom lip.

"I know I did, and... Well... We_ will_ talk, Nick. It's just that I'm tired now and I know that once I get home I'm not going to want to leave again, and-"

Nick pulled suddenly off the highway onto a dirt road that lead towards some random hills and not really much else. His heart was breaking a little with each movement further down the road.

Clearly Sara knew exactly what was troubling him and she didn't want to have to deal with it. Otherwise, why else would she keep trying to put him off? And so he'd decided on the spot to take matters into his own hands and at least get to say his piece.

Sara looked at him directly now.

"What are you doing? Where are we going?"

"If you're tired, then we may as well have our chat right now, right here."

She felt a lump form in her throat. "_Here_? In the _Denali_?" Her heart started to race, images of her fantasy re-surfacing abruptly in her mind. "But I'm... I'm all wet."

It sounded lame and she knew it. Nick had cranked the heat, and if anything she was warmer than she'd been when she was still dry.

"I'll try not to take too long." He looked at her intensely, and she had a feeling she couldn't possibly formulate an argument that he would listen to. She chewed at her lip again as he pulled the vehicle over and cut the engine.

"OK."

He undid his seatbelt and turned to face her, so she slowly did the same. The look in his eyes made her nervous, but she was as yet unsure why. If it weren't for the sound of the heavy rain falling on the roof, she was certain she'd be able to hear her heart pounding in her ears.

_Maybe I should start preparing for the big letdown_...

She braced herself and decided to dive right in. "So, Nick. What's on your mind?"

His mouth twitched into the semblance of a smile. "I have a sneaking suspicion you already know what's on my mind, judging by how you were acting the other day... and last week."

Now she was confused. "I... I don't know what you mean, Nick. Honestly."

If anything, she'd acted the way she had because she didn't want him to know what was on _her_ mind. She felt her throat tightening again.

_That's what he means: He knows how I'm feeling about him now, and he's going to try and stop things before they get out of hand_.

Nick watched her closely and noted a barrage of emotions running across her face, none of which he could interpret. Her skin was still damp, but he thought maybe it was from the heat this time. He desperately wanted to reach out and run his fngers across her soft cheek, and then let them slide down her graceful neck...

"Sara, I... I think I know why you've been acting the way you have towards me, and I wanted to let you know that... Well, it's OK. I understand."

She was stunned. "You do?"

He nodded and she thought he looked a little sad. "Yeah. Yeah, I do. But I don't want you to worry about it. I... I can..." He reached out and grabbed her hand, stroking the wrist unconsciously as he continued. "I can deal with it, OK? It doesn't have to get in the way of... work. Or anything... _else_."

A little bit of fire licked its way through her veins from the point where he touched her wrist. She leaned forward, feeling somehow braver in her confusion. "Nick, what are you talking about?"

His eyes were tinged with regret even though his mouth was smiling. "Me, you... How I feel about you."

She must have gasped, but she wasn't sure. "Me? How you feel about... _me_?"

"Yeah, I'm talking about these...uh... these feelings that I've sort of, um... _developed_. For you."

Her mouth was moving- she could feel it, but nothing was coming out.

Nick could see her distress and leaned forward to touch her cheek softly. He told himself that it was to make her feel better, but deep down he knew he was doing it for himself. He wanted to at least get to touch her once before he had to let her go.

His fingers caressed her damp skin tenderly. "Don't worry, Sara. I'm a grown-up. I can keep a rein on these feelings." And it would kill him... at least for a little while. But then maybe he'd be able to move on again. Maybe.

Her face was heating up and it had nothing to do with the hot air blasting out of the vents. She managed to force some words through her lips at last. "But... Nick..."

He was still stroking her cheek and it was driving her mad. "But _what_, Sara?"

She slowly reached up to touch the hand that was caressing her face, and she rubbed the back of it softly as she took a breath and looked into his eyes.

"But what if I don't _want_ you to rein in your feelings, Nick?" She felt her hand trembling as it continued to stroke his, and she smiled timidly.

"What if I don't want that at all?"

* * *

**_A.N: _**(con't) OK, so now they've had their little talk... I guess I should just leave it there, huh? ;) 


	13. Thirteen

**_A.N.:_** Man, it's amazing how just the _hint_ of a little _some'in some'in _gets those old reviews pumping out! Heh heh!

Well, here ya go my masochistic friends (cuz ya keep coming back for more, ya bunch of loonies! Nah, just joshin'- I love you guys. :D )

Hope this doesn't disappoint.

* * *

Nicks eyes dilated and he let out a ragged breath. "_What_?"

His hand suddenly clutched at hers, and she squeezed his fingers in encouragement.

"I... I don't want you to hold back, Nick." She smiled timidly. "I've developed some feeling for you too, it seems... Some pretty strong ones." She tilted her head nervously and waited for his reaction.

He was staring into her eyes in amazement, shaking his head slightly with disbelief even when she continued.

"You were right- I _was _avoiding you. But not for the reason you think." She clenched her hands in front of her anxiously. "I was scared you'd see how I feel about you now, and I figured you'd probably never feel the same way about me so..."

Nick was still shaking his head in astonishment as he leaned forward and crushed his lips against hers, his arms gripping her shoulders desperately. Her entire body turned to heated liquid as she pressed her mouth hungrily back against his. She couldn't stop the moan that issued from her throat and Nick pulled her even closer in response, his own growl of longing escaping.

She ran her hands up his back, clutching at his shoulder blades and finding herself lost against the hardness of his body, the _maleness_...

His hands moved up to cup her face gently, and he began to explore her mouth sensually. She slid her hands under his jacket and pushed her fingers under the back of his shirt, loving the feel of his heated skin. She moved her hands upwards, grasping and massaging him hungrily.

He groaned and shuddered slightly, then his hands began to slip downward and she felt him trying to move her soaking blouse down her shoulder as his lips traced down her neck. She shivered at the electrified trail his lips were leaving and tried to move herself even closer to his body, but the console seemed to be limiting their movements towards each other. As much as it pained her, Sara found herself pulling away from him and looking down between them awkwardly.

"Nick... We-"

He leaned back and looked at her apologetically. "Oh... Sara... I'm so sorry. I... We shouldn't be doing this."

When her brows furrowed into a frown, he had to admit he was relieved to see that she was disappointed. He fumbled quickly with his words. "I mean, _here_. We shouldn't be doing this _here_." He reached out and caressed her face once more, looking a little sheepish. "Then again, maybe this is all moving a little too fast for you... I'd understand perfectly if y-"

"_No_."

She cut him off quickly, and then instantly felt embarrassed. If only he knew how badly she'd wanted this... wanted _him_.

"No, it's not that." She put a hand on his knee and smiled at him shyly. "It's just that I never imagined we'd be fooling around in the front of an SUV..."

His mouth quirked into a grin. "Darlin', you definitely deserve much better than that, trust me. You deserve something special..." He grabbed her hand again and his fingers played with hers. "_As special as you are to me_."

She felt her heart swelling as she looked back at him in amazement. Once again she was tongue-tied, so she simply leaned forward to kiss him softly in response. The kiss he returned was much less intense this time but so incredibly sweet and sexy she could hardly think straight, and it was building into something that was making her body pulsate. She pulled back from him again and he regarded her with gentle inquiry.

"What's wrong?"

She smiled nervously again and looked down at her lap for a second as she started to speak. "Um, what I was trying to say before was that I never imagined we'd be fooling around in the front of your Denali... because in my fantasies we're always in the _back_."

She looked back up at him timidly, gauging his reaction. Had she been too bold?

At first he seemed stunned... and then that famous smile spread across his face and he started to laugh.

She smiled back and rubbed his knee a little, still feeling a bit shy about everything. "And I think it would be special no matter _where_ we were, Nick. _All I need is you_."

His chest was tightening and he couldn't find the words to respond, so he kissed her quickly on the lips and turned back towards his door, opening it while he popped the back hatch release. He threw his jacket in the back seat as he climbed out, calling over his shoulder.

"Don't move."

She giggled as he trotted around the front of the vehicle and then opened her door for her. The rain had eased off somewhat, but not much.

As she swung her legs around and turned towards him he leaned inwards and stood between her legs, moving in to kiss her again. She slid forward a bit and wrapped her arms around his back once more, pulling him tighter against her. His hips rested against her inner thighs and as the rain splashed against them, she thought it must be sizzling as it hit her flaming skin. Nick's back was quickly getting damper and she slid her fingers up into the hair at his nape, turned on even more by the wet, silky feel of it.

He groaned into her mouth and then slid his lips across her cheek and down to her throat where he licked gently at raindrops around her nape for a few moments before gnawing teasingly at her collar bone. His hands slid upward from her waist, brushing the outline of her breasts and causing her highly sensitive nipples to strain against her damp clothes. When she drew in a sharp intake of breath at the sensation, his eyes found hers again.

He looked into her face and she knew from the desire in his eyes that he wanted her as much as she wanted him. A wave of happiness and a touch of fear washed through her when she recognized something else there as well, lurking behind the raw passion... something she was too scared to name right now. But she knew one thing for certain: No one had ever looked at her that way before; not _ever_.

He continued to stare into her eyes as his fingers moved gently down from her throat and into the space between her breasts, his other hand pushing at the wet fabric. Her back arched in anticipation, and she closed her eyes as his head dipped down and kissed the skin that his hands worked to reveal. Despite the rain dripping down on them, her whole body was getting hotter and hotter by the second.

Nick's hand reached up to push her shirt off her shoulder, while his tongue played with the newly exposed swell of her breast. The tank top strap met the same fate, and soon only her pale peach bra was shielding her.

Hungry for the sensations she knew they were building towards, Sara gently guided Nick away, smiling understandably at his sudden look of desire-addled confusion. His eyes began to burn again as she pulled at the wet cotton hanging stickily off her shoulders and tried to pull it over her head. He helped her remove it, and then didn't wait for her help before he began to pull the tank top off as well.

Under any other circumstances, the ever-cautious Sara Sidle would have taken a moment to look around and make certain they were as isolated on this deserted dirt road as she hoped they were. But she was so focused on the unbelievably handsome, sexy man standing before her that the thought never even crossed her mind.

She began to ache for his touch again when he stood staring at her for a moment and she was about to reach out for him again when his hands moved out to grasp her waist, and then slowly slid upwards until they reached her breasts again. Her back arched once more and her core turned to liquid as his thumbs began to slowly massage her aching nipples through her bra.

As he moved in closer, she pulled him back between her legs, pulling impatiently at his soaked T-shirt. He quickly yanked it over his head and then forced his body back against hers, but the brief glimpse of his damp chest left her mind reeling and her center pulsing.

She wrapped her legs around him tighter and he moaned into her throat before picking her up and pulling her from the front seat. She knew she shouldn't be surprised by the hardness pressing against her inner thigh, but she was... and even more aroused than before.

Nick's crotch was throbbing so hard now he was tempted to drop her to the muddy earth and feverishly push himself inside her, but his heart told him to be patient- it would be _well_ worth the wait. And she deserved _better_.

In fact, if she hadn't been so obviously as anxious to make love to him as he was to her, he would have planned a much more elaborate date for them to consumate their newly sparked relationship. But it was clear to him that neither of them could wait, so he had every intention of making her as comfortable as possible, of he could. He clutched her bottom tightly and moved towards the back of the SUV.

She ran her hands down his shoulders and kissed his temple as he carried her, all the while kissing her neck and her shoulders. He leaned her gently back against the side of the vehicle and she let her legs drop down to support herself. He was looking at the back hatch door and she slid her hands down to his waist and began to play with the waistband of his jeans.

Distracted from his quest for shelter, he smiled as he took in the rain glistening off her nearly-bared chest, the pale bra now soaked through and revealing more than it covered.

_My god she's beautiful_.

His breathing was coming more heavily now and he ran his hands behind her back, deftly unclipping her bra. The thin slip of material dropped to the ground and he stood once more gazing down at her longingly. Her wet skin was gleaming in the muted daylight, and her hard nipples seemed to be calling out to him for attention.

She cried out when his head lowered, his mouth claiming the straining bud of one breast while his hand massaged the other slowly and sensually. She clutched at his hair and leaned back into the side of the Denali, lost in the overwhelming sensations of his lips possessing her.

She felt as if her breasts were swelling under his touch and her breath was coming in short gasps.

"Oh, Nick..._god_..."

He raised his head and the look in her eyes made him catch his breath.

_She really wants this as much as I do_.

He gave her what she thought was a surprisingly sweet smile under the circumstances, and he pushed at the hatch door, forcing it up and open. He reached for her hand and kissed her damp shoulder as she moved with him towards the entrance. He shoved their forensics kits backward impatiently and then turned and pulled her gently towards him, still overwhelmed at her half-nakedness. She was almost too beautiful to touch right now... Except he couldn't seem to keep his hands off her.

"Oh, wait a second..." He set her on the rear edge of the SUV with care while he crawled inward and reached over the seats.Pulling his jacket over, he layed it on the floor before he eased her back onto it.

He kissed her bare back softly. "I don't want you to get any scratches..."

She giggled and pulled him around her so that they were face to face and hip to hip. She put her hand against his cheek and caressed his lower lip with her thumb. "I don't mind."

He smiled tenderly and stroked her lower back. "Well _I do_. Your skin is so beautiful..."

He kissed her shoulder again and she all but purred as his lips moved up the side of her neck. She briefly glimpsed the rain coming down outside and mumbled into the top of his head.

"Should we close the door?"

He kissed the delicate skin behind her ear and nibbled on her lobe. "Nah... I have a feeling we'll need some cooler air."

She laughed lightly and leaned back as he urged her downwards. His lips moved back to hers and her hands slid down his chest to grasp at his waist. He followed her lead and slipped his hands down her stomach as he arched above her, running a finger enticingly under the waist of her pants.

"Besides, I don't want you to have to scruntch up those long, sexy legs of yours."

He leaned to the side and lowered his mouth back to hers, running his free hand down the outside of one of her legs and then sliding it ever so slowly and tantalisingly back up between her thighs, massaging her softly at the juncture. Her hips started to rise uncontrollably at the pressure of his hand, and he growled into her lips.

"You feel so _warm_... _Jesus_, _Sara_." His head lowered towards her chest again. "I don't think I've ever wanted someone this bad in my life..."

His lips captured her aching peaks again and she gasped in pleasure, sliding her hands down his back. She pushed her chest upwards towards him, her hand reaching under him to pull at his belt buckle.

"Please Nick... I..."

His mouth reclaimed hers and his hand joined hers at his belt, quickly releasing it and then pulling open his button fly. Sara partially sat up to push at the denim, and he helped her to force them off. Sara's eyes widened when she realized his underwear had come off with them, and his healthy maleness was before her. She was so distracted that she didn't notice he was undoing her pants until he moved onto his knees beside her and started moving them down her legs.

She snapped back into awareness and lifted her bottom from the floor as he pulled her remaining clothing free. She could feel the rain hitting her toes, but she felt like her body was on fire and nothing would ever be able to put it out... except maybe the man before her.

But first he fanned the flames once more when his mouth slid across her hipbone and his fingers slipped into the downy curls beside it. When they touched the damp folds of flesh below she cried out, and he drew in a ragged breath and gently pushed one finger up inside of her. Her breasts, her womanhood... everything was throbbing in delicious agony for the man beside her.

"Nick... Please... I _need_ you."

She pulled him up her body and clutched at his waist before her hand slid down between his legs, grasping his massive erection. He moaned and pushed his face into her neck, his lips devouring her in a frenzied onslaught.

Suddenly, he raised his head and looked at her in mild panic.

"Oh... _no_... I... _I don't have anything with me_."

If she hadn't been so impossibly aroused she might have laughed at the look of torment on his face, but all she said was, "It's... It's OK, Nick. I'm on the pill. And I don't have any...um..._issues _you need to worry about."

He smiled with immense relief and kissed her passionately before whispering, "Me either."

He lowered his hips on to hers and she could feel his stiffness pressing into her midriff. She reached down to stroke him ardently, and his whole body tensed. Moving her hips rhythmically she guided him into her, gasping out loud when he pushed inside her urgently and cried out himself.

He looked down into her face, concerned. "Is it...are you OK?"

She clutched at his behind and drew him further into her again, pushing her face into his shoulder, her voice just a ragged whisper. "God _yes_, Nick... I'm so much better than _OK_."

He moaned in pleasure as she began to move with him, and they both clung to each other desperately as the overwhelming bliss mounted and then finally took them over the edge...

* * *

_A.N. (part 2):_ OK, I'll tell you _what_... I've been feeling so pressured to get this chapter out that I've been stuck in the library every night typing! Do you know how hard it is to write erotica when a bunch of little kids are running around you? MAN! lol.

Anyway, I hope it turned out to everyone's satisfaction. I always find that sexy stuff hard to write. Don't worry, there's a little more to come in the story. (No pun intended! ;) )


	14. Fourteen

_**A.N.:**_ Again, I've been desperate for internet time! Sorry. And I have to admit, the writer's block has returned big time... But good news- I finally have my computer set up at home, so I should be able to do more than sneak the odd read of other people's stories. Hope you've all been able to stick with me after all these big gaps between chapters!

Recap- They _did_ it. In the back of Nick's SUV. Uh, maybe you should re-read the last chapter, because I think it was actually a bit better than that sounds! lol.

* * *

Sara stretched her toes out, sighing at the tingle still running through her body. Nick pulled her closer to him, wrapping his arms around her as she snuggled into his neck. She sighed contentedly and then felt herself beginning to blush.

"Did we just do what I think we just did?"

Nick's voice was low and husky. "_Oh yeah_. A couple times, in fact." He caressed her back gently.

She kissed his throat and slid a leg between his. He slid one hand down to stroke her thigh and she sighed again.

"Thanks, Nick."

"For what?"

"For having the courage I didn't have."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I could have gone on avoiding you and ignoring my feelings... probably forever. Thank god you said something."

He laughed lightly. "Yeah, I did... but I didn't think I was gonna get the happy ending."

She squeezed him again. "Which makes you even braver still. I just...I didn't think I could handle any more rejection."

He kissed the top of her head and spoke softly. "They're all fools, Sara."

She felt herself smiling uncontrollably. "But not you?"

He pulled back and looked down at her, grinning. "Nah. I know a good thing when I see it."

She laughed and lifted her hand to rest on his cheek. "Me too." She leaned up and kissed him tenderly.

He smiled into her lips and spoke when they finally broke apart. "As much as I'm enjoying this, maybe we should think about heading back into town..."

She groaned unhappily and buried her face back into his neck. "_Arg_. Can't we just stay here forever? Become known as those crazy truck people who live in the desert?"

He laughed and ran his hands up her back again. "_Tempting_. But I was sort of thinking my place might be a little more comfortable. Or your place. Either way..." Then he felt awkward. "I mean, that is... If you want to."

She leaned up and looked into his eyes, relieved to see that he was uncertain. She didn't think she could handle it if he looked like he was having second thoughts.

"Yes, Nick, I'd like to." She kissed him softly. "Very much."

He let out a sigh of relief and smiled back at her. "Me too." He stroked her back. "So, uh... should we get going?"

She nodded and slowly began to pull away. He watched her sit up and leaned on an elbow while she tried to figure out whose jeans were whose. Feeling his eyes on her back, she turned to him in question.

"Aren't you getting dressed?"

He gave her a lazy smile and ran a finger down her arm. "Yeah, eventually."

"What are you waiting on?"

"I'm just enjoying the view."

Sara blushed and clutched the jeans in front of her. "Don't stare at me. You're making me self-conscious."

He laughed at her sudden shyness. "Sara, after what we just did, I don't think-"

"I know, I know... Humor me, OK?" She smiled in embarrassment.

He laughed and sat up beside her, grabbing the jeans from her hands. "OK fine, but these are _mine_."

She blushed even more and tried to cover herself again. Nick chuckled some more and slid himself into his jeans and then out onto the ground as Sara grabbed at her own pair. Then she realized her bra and shirts were currently resting in places unknown.

"Uh, Nick...?"

He laughed at her appearance, sitting in the back of his SUV with her hands across his chest. He knew the problem, but he was enjoying this too much. "_Yes_?"

"I need... do you know where my shirts are?"

"Yep." He grinned.

She started to laugh. "Well, _good_. Can you _get them_ for me, please?"

He grinned some more and made his way around the side of the vehicle. He returned a moment later with the wet shirts and her muddy bra dangling off one finger. "Want this too?"

She wrinkled her nose at the dirty garment. "I think maybe I'll just go without until we get back."

Nick smiled enigmatically at her as she pulled her damp white shirts over her head. They were clinging to her nicely and revealing much more than she probably realized. "Are you sure?"

She raised her brows at him and looked down at herself. She looked up in embarrassment, shaking her head as she stood in front of him, arms once more crossed over her chest. "Stop looking at me."

He moved in closer and wrapped her in his own arms. "Can't do it, sorry.You're too beautiful." He held her close while he kissed her soundly, and Sara could feel herself on the verge of a swoon. Just when she thought she might need to pull him into the back of the Denali again, he broke away and smiled into her face.

"We better go."

She caught her breath and nodded in wonder. "Yeah, I think we better."

Nick pulled out his kit and grabbed a clear evidence bag while Sara looked on in confusion.

"What are you doing?"

He dropped her muddy bra inside and sealed it. "This is evidence."

She laughed. "Of what, exactly?"

"That heaven exists." He flashed her a self-satisfied grin and she started to laugh.

"Oh man, Nick. That was the cheesiest line _ever_."

He pretended to be insulted. "What do you mean? That was _inspired_!" He grabbed her hand and led her back to the passenger seat, holding the door open for her and helping her inside.

Sara couldn't seem to stop laughing. "Yeah, well... You better bag your jacket too then." She looked back towards the back, and their make-shift 'blanket'. "I'm pretty sure we don't want anyone hitting that with the A.L.S. any time soon!"

He was laughing as he climbed behind the wheel. "No doubt!"

* * *

They realized that by the time they got back, it was almost time for Nick to head into work again. Reluctantly, he dropped Sara home and made for his own house to shower. He'd wanted to suggest that Sara join him, but she'd looked completely exhausted so he'd kept his mouth shut.

A while later, he strolled into the staff room with a small grin on his face and Warrick picked up on it immediately.

"Hmmm. Somebody looks too happy. What happened?"

Nick laughed and shook his head. "Nothing I want to tell you, man."

He watched as Warrick seemed ready to make a retort, but Catherine arrived in time to save the day.

"OK guys. We've got a particularly grisly one. I hope you didn't have a big dinner before shift..." She started moving out into the hall and they followed her. Warrick gave Nick a look that said he wasn't finished with him, but Nick acted oblivious.

* * *

Sara woke up later feeling a little sore and she was momentarily confused.

_Ugh_._ I must have slept wrong_.

Then she remembered.

She was grinning uncontrollably a minute later when she headed into her bathroom.

_Me and Nick Stokes_; _who would've thought it_?

She cleaned up and wasn't surprised to find that she was famished. After a huge breakfast, she decided to head into work a little early in the hope that she would run into Nick.

Grissom called out as she passed his office. She moved into his doorway.

"Sara, I know you're not technically starting for another 45 minutes, but..."

Never one to shy away from hard work, Sara took her new assignment, smirking to herself as she headed out to her SUV.

_Well, so much for catching Nick before work_.

* * *

Nick hovered around his locker a little longer than usual, checking his watch at intervals. He'd gotten there well before Sara should have been starting shift, but so far he hadn't seen her anywhere around the building. He was tempted to call her cell phone, but he didn't want to appear desperate. After all, he had just spent time with her earlier that day...

_And, oh what a time it was_.

He took another tour around the labs, hoping to find her. He ran into Greg departing Grissom's office.

"Hey man. You haven't seen Sara around have you?"

"No, she's already out on assignment. Why, you need something?"

"Nothing that can't wait. Later, G."

He felt a bit let down, but he should have expected it. Since the shifts had split up, he saw less and less of his other colleagues. As he drove home, he couldn't seem to shake the disappointment that she hadn't tried to find him between their shifts.

_Grow up, Stokes_. _She has a job to do, same as you_.

But he found little consolation in that fact when he went home to his empty house.

* * *

Sara yawned into her hand hoping Grissom hadn't noticed, but of course he had.

"Sara, you sleeping OK?"

Sara's brows went up. She'd worked with Grissom for 5 years and he'd never asked her anythingas personal as that.

"Uh, yeah. Yeah, I'm sleeping fine."

He looked at her over the rims of his glasses, but said nothing. He wondered if she was still feeling the effects of being held at gunpoint, but wasn't sure how to address it. Before he could think of anything to say, however, Hodges poked his head in the room.

"I'm not going to have those results ready until tomorrow, boss. Sorry. We're still backed up from days."

Grissom frowned, but the sight of Sara trying to stifle another yawn had him thinking twice about pulling rank. He looked back at the Trace analyst.

"That's fine, Hodges. We're going to finish off here for now anyway. But..." He looked seriously at the other man. "I will expect them at the start of shift tonight."

Hodges gave a mock salute and left the room. Sara looked at Grissom in question.

"We're done?"

"For now. We can't do much until we get the Trace results, and DNA will probably take longer." He watched as Sara leaned back in her chair, and rubbed at her eyes. "Sara, you sure you're sleeping alright?"

She stopped herself from grinning, feeling that it would somehow give her away. The truth was, she wasn't used to getting as much _exercise_ as she'd gotten yesterday... but that was her own little secret.

"Seriously, Gris. I'm fine."

He nodded absently and then seemed to stare at her a little more intently than she was accustomed to. She was beginning to feel a bit uncomfortable under his scrutiny when he finally smiled at her, and she thought he looked almost... _what_?

_Hopeful_?

Which was why she was shocked at his next statement.

"Sara, I know you're tired, but I was hoping you'd join me for..." He checked his watch. "Lunch."

She couldn't speak for a moment.

_Is he_... _Is he asking me on a lunch date_?

"Uh... Well I-"

She was cut off by her ringing cell phone. She flicked it open quickly, glad for the distraction.

"Sidle."

"Hey _Sidle_. You still working?"

She was praying to god that she wasn't blushing as she heard Nick's sultry Texas accent carressing her eardrums.

"Oh, hello. No, actually I'm just finishing."

Nick thought she sounded a little stiff, but he pushed on anyway. "So, I was wondering if you'd like to join me for brunch? I'll even break with tradition and pay for yours."

Her heart started to pitter patter at the smile she could hear in his voice, and then she looked back at Grissom waiting patiently across the table from her.

_Shit_. _Now what do I do_?


	15. Fifteen

Sara made a quick decision in her mind.

She spoke into her cell phone, trying to keep it professional in front of Grissom.

"Um, I'm sorry but something's just come up, so I don't think I can go. Maybe I can get a raincheck?"

Nick frowned into the receiver. Clearly she was in the room with someone else or she wouldn't be talking so business-like. But still...

"Sure, Sara. We can do it another time. Uh, maybe you can call me later?"

"Will do. Thanks."

And with that she hung up.

Nick stared at his cell phone for a few moments before setting it down. He was positive she hadn't been alone when she'd been speaking with him, but he still couldn't seem to shake the feeling that something else was going on.

* * *

What a strange day it had turned out to be and if she'd been tired before, she was completely exhausted now.

But even so, Sara was grinning from ear to ear as she went to bed. Just as she was dozing off, she remembered that she'd promised to phone Nick, but she was unable to prevent herself from drifting off into a contented sleep.

* * *

Warrick and Nick nodded to Greg as they entered the staff room. The youngest CSI stretched his arms over his head, yawning.

"You guys are in late. How's the DFO going?"

Nick scowled slightly and shrugged his shoulders, but Warrick was the one to elaborate.

"We're banging our heads against a wall. Just when we think we've got the wife dead to rights, the evidence takes a hard right and we're looking at the brother again." He sat down with a groan. "I'm starting to think I might just plant incriminating evidence on the next one of them who pisses me off again."

Greg grinned and looked at Nick. "Swell folks to deal with, huh?"

Nick snorted derisively and mumbled something about _supreme understatements_ as he poured himself some coffee. After one sip,face scruntched up in disgust. "Jesus... how old's this coffee?" He shook his head in annoyance. "Can my day get any fucking better?"

Warrick said nothing and moved towards the fridge, but Greg was surprised at his colleague's mood.

"What's up with you, Nick? Since when do you let cases put you in a bad mood?"

Nick didn't even bother to answer as he moved towards the water cooler. Greg looked at Warrick again, but he just gave him anon-committal look and shook his head.

The truth was, Warrick didn't know for sure what Nick's problem was either, although he had his suspicions.His friend had arrived at work looking less than rested this afternoon and while not great, his mood hadn't been _that_ bad in the beginning. But as the shift had progressed and the suspects came and went, Nick's temper had begun to boil over more frequently. This in itself was unusal enough for Nick... or at least it had been until recently.

While he suspected this may have had something to do with Sara, Warrick hadn't felt the urge to ask Nick about it. The truth was, whenever something was bothering Nick, he talked about it. The fact that he _wasn't_ talking made Warrick think he'd better let him alone for a while and wait and see if he felt like talking about it later.

But right now, he decided to derail the trainwreck that was Greg Sanders.

"Why're you so happy anyway, Sanders? You kick ass on Madden NFL or something?"

Greg's expression became smug. "While it's true that that's always a momentary high... _no_, that's not why I'm in such a good mood." He suddenly looked even more self-satisfied. "I had a hot date last night with Jenny."

"Jenny? The lab tech?"

"The one and only. And she's digging me big time."

Warrick's brows went up. "Mmmm hmmm. You show her your latex collection yet?"

Greg smirked. "Scoff if you must but it was a love connection, I'm telling you. And hey, with the waything are going for everyone around the lab lately, maybe you'll get hit by cupid's arrow too... cheer up that disposition of yours."

Warrick laughed slightly. "I gotta girlfriend, spanky. My disposition's all good."

"Well, whatever... there's something in the air around here, seriously. Maybe it'll help cheer up _chuckles_ over there." He motioned towards Nick.

Warrick was looking impatient now. "Sanders, what are you on about, man?"

"Just that everyone seems to be catching some action around here lately. I saw Mia and Neil canoodling earlier, Bobby was rushing off to meet a new girl, and then there was Grissom taking Sara to lunch, as if miracles will never cease. Hell _even_ Hodges has-"

"Grissom and Sara?" Warrick had seen Nick's brows go up in shock and he decided to jump in before he said something rash to Greg. "You're saying _Grissom _took_ Sara_ out for lunch today?"

"Yep. Saw it with my own eyes. Looks like the guy finally opened his eyes and saw what a hot, young-"

"Greg, how do you know they weren't just grabbing a bite after shift?"

"Have you ever seen those two going to lunch alone before? And if that was the case, why weren't Sofia and I invited? We were right there..."

He trailed off, looking at Warrick in confusion. "What's the big deal anyway? We all know Sara's had a thing for him for years. It was bound to happen."

"I'm outta here, Rick. See ya tomorrow." Nick's voice was tight as he moved behind Greg and out the doorway.

Warrick turned around, looking at Greg with an expression that indicated he was less than impressed. Greg looked bewildered.

"_What_? What'd I say?"

Warrick just shook his head and left the room.

* * *

Nick drove. And then he drove some more. When he finally stopped, he found himself back at the place where Sara and he had made love. Or at least he thought they'd made love. It was looking like it had just been convenient sex for Sara.

_How could I have been so stupid_?

He thought maybe it was some sort of divine justice for the number of hearts he'd broken over the years. And there'd been a few, that was for sure. But it had never been on purpose. Nick went into every relationship hopeful and full of good intentions, but he'd just never found the _one_. Not until now. And look how that was turning out...

He'd gotten up earlier than usual to try to ctch Sara for brunch, but after she'd turned him down, he'd tried to go back to sleep and try not to think about her, but it had been no use. He'd tossed and turned and pictured her face looking at him gratefully after he'd gone with her to the gunman's line-up. Or when she'd apologized for being harsh to him, and had admitted she didn't want to lose him. Or when she'd been flushed and breathing heavily underneath him...

Every image was more agrivating than the last and he'd finally gotten up and tried to watch some TV, all the while feeling edgy and frustrated. And then he'd been mad at himself for acting like a mooning teenager waiting for the phone to ring. But later, once he'd found out why she'd blown him off, the fact that she hadn't called him was a little too telling for his liking.

He leaned against his SUV and stared up at the moonlight. It was beautiful out here, all quiet and romantic... and all he wanted to do was shout at the sky in anger.

_Was she just using me to bait Grissom_?

But every time he tried to believe that was possible, he'd see her eyes in his mind. The way she had looked at him... She had to have meant the things she said to him. She'd seemed so sincere, so genuine. Sara had never been good at hiding her feelings, and they'd all been able to read her like a book for the most part. She was a terrible liar.

And that wasn't even counting the way she'd responded to him physically. The sex had been extraordinary, and he knew he hadn't imagined how responsive she'd been to him. No, there's no way Sara could have become that good an actress in so short a time.

_No way_.

So that left one alternative, and this was almost more disturbing to him than the idea that she'd used him to get Grissom's attention:

_Maybe she really did want me_. _But she wants Grissom more_.

His cell phone startled him out of his brooding. He looked at the call display: _Sara Sidle_.

_This must be the part where she lets me down gently_...

He shut off his phone and climbed back into his Denali. The moonlight guiding him home just made his world seem a little lonlier.

* * *

Sara frowned at her phone when Nick's voice mail picked up. She left a message.

"Hey Nick, it's just me. Uh, Greg said I missed you earlier and, um... he also said you weren't in a very good mood. Is everything OK?" She paused, as if she hoped his voice would suddenly come on and answer her. "Well, anyway... I guess I'll talk to you later?"

She hung up, sorry that she'd missed him. And it was ironic that he was in a bad mood when she was feeling nothing less than jubilant.

Greg materialized behind her and she hoped he hadn't been listening in. His return to his previous line of questioning seemed to indicate he hadn't.

"So come on, Sara. Tell me the truth: What was your lunch with Grissom all about, huh?"

She smiled mysteriously and patted him on the shoulder, her good mood making her feel a little playful. "Now Greg, that's really none of your business."

"Fine, be that way. And I was going to kindly offer to let you two double-date with Jenny and I..."

Sara snorted in amusement. "Yeah, because that'll definitely happen, Greg!" She couldn't stop the laughter that followed, and Greg tried to look insulted, but just ended up grinning.

"OK, OK... But don't say I never think of you." He held his hands toward the corridor before them. "Shall we?"

She nodded formally. "Thank you, kind sir."

He followed her down the hall, commenting to her back. "Seriously, Sara, you're in an awfully good mood. Are you sure you don't want to tell-"

"Greg! Give it up!" She gave an exasperated laugh and he bit back his next words and followed her around the corner.


	16. Sixteen

_**A.N.:**_ Thanks to those who've stuck around!

Jackie- I'm sorry, but it was all part of the plan. Trust me!

Sorry, I meant to bang this one off a little faster but I just rented "Evel" and I've been a little distracted by the many shots of George's _incredibly _hot body. _**YEOWCH**_! So _very_ fine, lemme tell ya! Even John Badham, the director was making comments about it in the commentary!

OK... _must move on_... Back to the story.

* * *

Sara was feeling a little tired after her shift finished and she chalked it up to being a bit wired for the entire shift. But now she really wanted to talk to Nick.

Unfortunately, he didn't seem to be answering either of his phones.

_I guess he's still sleeping_...

But she really needed to talk to him, especially after everything that had happened...

* * *

Nick sipped his coffee and mulled over the morning news on TV without much conviction.

_Earthquakes, murders, fires_... _what else is new_? _Basically, the world sucks_.

At this last thought, he sat back in his chair.

_Man, what is wrong with me_?

He hadn't actually talked to Sara since just after their encounter in the desert, and he'd somehow managed to jump to a whole lot of conclusions since then.

_Maybe I should pull my head out of my ass and just answer one of her calls_.

The thing was, this was a different scenario then he'd ever faced before. He realized that this woman actually meant more to him than any other before her. And it was making him stupid, that much was clear.

Plus, there was the fact that they worked together, and she was a respected colleague who may or may not have a past with _another_ highly respected colleague- Grissom. It was hard to get his head around.

But one thing was for certain: He'd fallen hard. And it was making him feel strangely vulnerable, a feeling he hadn't felt since his much younger years.

_Damn, I hate feeling like I'm not in control anymore_.

* * *

Sara pulled into the driveway and took a deep breath before she climbed out of her car.

_OK, here goes_...

She walked up to the door and took a moment to calm herself before she knocked on the door. She was about to admit something important to a man who she'd come to count as one of her closest friends, and she didn't want to blow it.

The door finally opened, and a strangely mellow-looking Nick answered the door. He looked like he'd just gotten out of the shower, with wet hair and clad in a pair of shorts and a dark T-shirt. He smiled slightly at her before moving away from the door and gesturing for her to enter. "Hey Sara."

"Hey yourself."

She tried to smile normally, but she felt a little nervous as she walked past him into his living room. She'd been here before, but it seemed to have taken on a surreal quality in her current nervous state. Especially sinceNick didn't look that happy to see her either, which in turn had her questioning whether she was doing the right thing.

_Well, I'm here now,_ _so_...

"I tried to call you but I kept getting your voicemail. I hope it's OK that I came over."

He gave her a small smile. "Yeah... yeah, of course it's OK."

He had wanted to play it cool and not give anything away, but just the sight of her standing in his living room made his heart lurch hopefully. He couldn't help himself- he was just too damned happy to see her.

"So, you want a drink or something?" He moved towards his fridge and grabbed a bottle of water, more from a need to look somewhere other than at her than from any real thirst.

"No, thanks. I'm OK."

He sauntered back into the living room and flopped down on his sofa, trying toappear casual as he looked up at her.

"So, what's up?"

Sara licked her lips nervously and then sat down in a chair. She was becoming more and more disturbed by how distant he seemed.

"I... I guess nothing really. I just... well I haven't seen you since... well, _you know_."

"Yeah. Yeah that's right. So, how... Uh, how was lunch yesterday?" Nick hated how immature he felt right now, but he couldn't stop himself. "With _Grissom_."

Now Sara was surprised. "H-... How did you know it was with Grissom?" Then she felt a lightbulb flick on. "Ah... Greg?"

Nick nodded but said nothing more and she was even more confused by his cool demeanor.

"Um, actually it went really well. It was very... _enlightening_."

Nick's heartbeat sped up uncomfortably but he tried not to let it show. "Oh yeah? How so?"

She chewed the inside of her lip uncertainly, and then decided that she'd come this far so she might as well step up to the plate.

"Well, I was obviously a bit surprised when he asked me out for lunch. And a bit curious."

_Yeah, I'll bet you were_.

Nick kept the thought to himself and waited for the other shoe to fall.

_So, you went to lunch and finally realized who you really want to be with_...?

The thought made his stomach churn, but still he said nothing and finally she continued.

"Yeah, well... to be honest, I sort of thought... Jeeze, Nick... I don't know _what_ I thought." She was suddenly too embarrassed to admit it.

"You thought maybe Grissom had finally come to his senses and wanted to... Oh, I don't know... _pursue a relationship_ with you?"

Sara was floored. "How... How did you know that?"

He shrugged and looked at the floor uncomfortably. He didn't trust himself to speak rationally at the moment so he remained silent.

"Well, I guess I just needed to know if that was the case... I mean, after so long... Well anyway, I went. And it turned out much better than I had hoped."

For some reason Nick couldn't seem to get excited about this. He still didn't say anything so she went on.

"It turned out he did want to address our relationship... as boss and employee. And it was... well it was really, really _cathartic_. He told me things... I don't know- I guess he told me a lot of the things that I'm ashamed to admit I've always wanted to hear...but I never had. At least not from him."

Nick was starting to feel a little confused.

_OK, this is not where I thought we'd be heading_.

"Anyway, my past feelings for him aside, I've just always thought of him as a genius, you know? And secretly... or maybe not so secretly... I don't know...I've always wanted to measure up in his eyes." She let out a small breath. "I guess that must sound ridiculous to you-"

"_No_..." He moved closer to her, sliding down the sofa towards her chair a bit more. "No, it doesn't sound ridiculous at all."

Buoyed by a new sense of hope, he opened up a little bit more to her. "In fact, I've been down that road myself. But I finally learned that I had nobody to please but myself, in the long run."

Sara nodded, smiling now. "Yeah... Yeah, I know what you mean. I think it's ironic that he finally gave me the attention I craved from him after I no longer really needed it." Her mouth curved up on one side. "But I guess it was nice to hear anyway."

Nick grinned slightly. "So, uh... What did you talk about?"

She smiled widely, clearly happy to finally get to talk out all the things that had toubled her in the past. Nick felt his heart warm up a little at her glowing expression. "Well, _everything_. Everything from why he brought me to Las Vegas to begin with, to why he gave you the supervisor recommendation over me, to how well he thought I'd dealt with that gunman scenario... Although I admitted I had a little help when I needed it." She reached out to grab his hand. "A_ lot_ of help, actually."

Nick felt the hairs on the back of his arms stand up at her touch. Feeling braver still, he ventured, "I'd do anything for you, Sara. You know that don't you?"

She blushed and looked down at their intermingled fingers but said nothing.

Nick still needed to know one thing for certain though, and he knew he'd never get a better chance to ask.

"So, when you found out he hadn't asked you to lunch to confess his feelings for you..."

She looked up at him while he spoke, and was a little overwhelmed by the intensity of his expression. She swallowed slightly and waited for him to go on.

"Well, I guess what I'm wondering is... Were you disappointed?"

Sara's brows raised at his question and she stared back into his eyes. She was on the verge of asking him why he was asking her this when she recognized a familiar emotion floating beneath the intensity of his stare: Worry.

He was afraid she still wanted to be with Grissom.

As much as she didn't want to, she couldn't stop the smile from forming on her lips as she stared back at him in wonder. She clutched his fingers a little tighter.

"_No_, Nick. I wasn't disappointed. I was _relieved_."

She saw a momentary flash of something behind his eyes, but he hid it quickly before smiling gently. "Yeah? Why?"

"Because I didn't have to explain how I'd fallen for someone else." She looked down at his hand again and massaged the back slowly. "And fallen _hard_."

Nick took in a deep breath, and as she looked back into his face he pulled her close and wrapped his arms around her.

"_Thank god_."

He was squeezing her so close to him she was almost having difficulty breathing, but she wasn't about to let go. It felt so good to be in his arms that she was afraid she might burst from sheer happiness.

Then he let out a low groan. "God, I'm such an idiot."

She pulled back from him a bit. "What? Why are you an idiot? I was the one who was stupid enough to actually think Grissom might be interested in me." She smiled sheepishly. "It's pretty embarrassing really."

He shook his head. "There's nothing stupid about that, Sara. The man's a damned fool for never having at least taken a chance with you... But I'm not complaining!" He smiled and kissed her softly. She responded eagerly and he felt even more foolish than before and let out another half-groan, half-chuckle. Sara looked at him with amusement.

"What?"

"It's just that... Uh..." He rubbed the back of his neck and looked uncomfortable.

"Nick, what's going on with you?" Sara was laughing lightly.

"It's just that I thought... I thought you were coming over here to tell me you wanted to be with Grissom." He looked even more sheepish and she stared at him in amazement.

"You thought that I..." She shook her head fractionally. "Is that why you weren't answering my calls?"

He nodded bemusedly.

"And why you seemed a little distant when I first got here?"

He laughed now and rubbed his neck again. "Mmmm hmmm."

She shook her head in disbelief. "Well then I think I'm going to have to agree with you: You _are_ an idiot." She started laughing and her hands tenderly cupped his face as she looked him in the eyes.

"Did it escape your notice how much I wanted to be with you the other day in your SUV?"

He still looked embarrassed. "Well, I _thought_ you did, but... Then I thought I might have been mistaken."

She groaned now herself and pulled him back into her arms. "Nick, Nick... What am I going to do with you?"

He laughed into her neck and kissed it softly.

"Anything you want, darlin'. Anything you want."

She pulled away from him and smiled shyly as she touched his cheek again. "I...Uh... I might have a few ideas about that, actually."

He looked at her greedily. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah." She stood now and reached for his hand, encouraging him to his feet. He moved closer and put his arms around her again. Kissing her sweetly, he mumbled something into her lips and she giggled as she broke away from him.

"What was that, again?"

"I _said_, maybe I should take you on a real date before we make love again."

She smiled and traced his lower lip with her finger. "What? So you can get to know me?"

He laughed softly. "Nah, I just thought you deserved to be wined and dined... For real this time."

She tried not to smirk but couldn't help it. "Um, Nick? There's something I need to confess to you?"

"Yeah? What's that?"

"I sort of thought of our un-date as a _real _date... Or, at least I kind of pretended it was..."

He smiled wider and kissed her again. "Me too."

"Really?"

"Oh yeah."

"Then I guess we don't need to worry about formalities right now then, do we?"

He ran his hands up and down her arms softly, and his voice was a mere whisper. "I guess not."

Her pulse rate quickened at the heat behind his glance before he lowered his lips to hers once more. A small thread of thought slipped through her love-addled brain as Nick guided her back towards his bedroom:

Gil_ who?_

**_THE END_**


End file.
